Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man makes a suggestion to his wife. “Honey, what do you say that tonight we change positions?” His wife responds with, “Yes, I would really like that! Tonight, you stand by the ironing board, and I’ll lie on the couch and watch TV.”
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A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a shotgun. “It’s for my husband,” she tells the clerk. “Did he tell you what gauge to get?” asked the clerk. “Are you kidding?” she says. “He doesn’t even know that I’m going to shoot him!”
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Once I was caught by an eye-catching phase that said “Take A Chance”. It was on a small box that had a picture of a beautiful car so I immediately filled out the information on the card, folded it up and placed it in the box. The next thing I knew, I had extra charges on my phone bill and my long distance company had been changed. I immediately switched back and everytime I see one of those boxes, I…
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Problem Flow Chart 1. Does it work? 2. If “Yes” go to 4. 3. If “No” go to 6. 4. Leave it alone. Do not touch it. Go to 5. 5. No problem. 6. Did you touch it? 7. If “Yes” go to 9. 8. If “No” go to 10 9. YOU IDIOT!!! Go to 13. 10. Will you get into trouble? 11. If “Yes” go to 18. 12. If “No” go to 16. 13. Does anyone else know? 14.…
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My dad bought my mom a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, I asked Dad how she was doing with it. “Oh,” said my dad, “I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet.” “How come?” I asked. “Well,” he answered “because with a clarinet she can’t sing . . .”
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For the first time in many years, a friend of ours traveled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn. Handing the attendant $1.50, my friend couldn’t help but comment, “The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents.” “Well, Sir,” the attendant replied with a grin, “you’re really going to enjoy yourself. We have sound now.”
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A young man, who was an avid golfer, found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in nine holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off, an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man. Not being able to say “No,” he allowed the old gent to join him. To his pleasant…
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A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend. “It sounds as if you had a great time in Texas,” the friend observed. “But didn’t you tell me you were planning to visit Colorado?” “Well,” the husband said, “we changed our plans because, uh…” His wife cut in, “Oh, tell the truth, Fred!” He feel silent, and she continued, “You know, it’s just ridiculous. Fred simply will NOT ask for directions.”
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Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag? A: The one is white, made of plastic and dangerous to children, in the other one you put your groceries.
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There were three dead men. One was an Italian, one was a millonaire, and one was gay. God told them they could have a second chance in life, if they could stay away from the things they love the most for one day. The guys said ok. “PUFF”– they were alive again. They were walking and all of a sudden the Italian guy smells Italian food, so goes ands eats the food. “PUFF” — he’s gone. Well the gay guy…
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