2 Cowboys in a car.
Q. If Dieon Sanders and Michael Irvin are in a car who is driving? A. The police officer.
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Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Cha cha cha Jokes - page 106
‘bozo’ index
Just in case we need any additional proof that the “bozo index” is at all time highs (and going higher), consider these for-real label instructions on consumer goods: ************************************* On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that’s the only time I have to work on my hair!) On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that…
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Formulae for a Happy Marriage
1. My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food… She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. ” —————– 2. I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?” She said, “Some where I have never been!” I told her, “How about the kitchen?” —————– 3. She has an electric blender, electric toaster, and electric bread maker.…
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Presidential T-shirts
A man walks into a tee shirt store. There are three shirts on display. The first has a picture of Richard Nixon with a white mustache. Below the picture, its title says, “Got Milk.” The second tee shirt has a picture of Ronald Reagan with a white mustache. It is entitled, “Forgot Milk.” The third tee shirt has a picture of Monica Lewinsky with a white mustache on it. It is entitled, “Not Milk.”
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Mamma’s lips
Your mamma’s lips are sooooooooo fat that chapstick had to invent an aerosol
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Joe Shitz
There was this guy named Joe Shitz. He lived his whole life with this peculiar name, and he finally decided to have it legally changed. He told his friend “I was tired of everyone making fun of my name. I decided to finally do something about it.” His friend asked “So what did you change your name to?” He replied “I changed it to Melvin Shitz. I was tired of everone saying “What d’ya know, Joe.”
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Mrs. Clinton
Q: Did you hear Hillary changed her name? A: She changed it to Sharron Peters.
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Why it’s Great To Be A Guy
Why It’s GREAT To Be A Guy Your ass is never a factor in a job interview. Your orgasms are real. Always. Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow. Wedding plans take care of themselves. You don’t have to curl up next to a hairy ass every night. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be president. You can wear a white shirt to a water park. Foreplay is optional. You…
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Barbie And Ken’s Letters To Santa
Barbie’s Letter To Santa: Dear Santa: Listen, you fat little troll, I’ve been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas Present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid weather, and drowning in fake tea from one too many tea parties, and I hate to break it to ya Santa, but IT’S DEFINITELY PAY BACK TIME! There had better be some changes around here this Christmas, or I’m gonna call for a nationwide meltdown (and trust me, you…
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Outdoor Irish Adventure
Three Irishmen arrive at the local pet store in county Armagh and buy all the parrots and all the budgerigars in the shop. They stuff the birds into a bag and declare to the shop owner that they are off for an outdoor adventure. The shop owner is a bit concerned about why the three men would want so many parrots and budgees, so he waits until they are gone and follows them in his car. The Irishmen drive to…
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