Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
“Say,” said the smooth operator in a confidential tone to the host of the party, “there’s a lot of hot babes at this party. If I find one that’s ready to grab a quick one, would you mind if I used your extra bedroom?” “What about your wife?” “Oh, I won’t be gone that long. She’ll never miss me.” “No, I’m sure she won’t miss you,” smirked the host, “but fifteen minutes ago SHE borrowed the extra bedroom.”
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Dear Customers: It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 98 SOUTHERN EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside the South. If you have one of these, you may need some help understanding the commands. The Southern edition may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads “WINDERS 98” and has a background picture of General Robert E. Lee superimposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a Dukes of Hazzard screen saver.…
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20. I’m going to give you ten pence, so you can phone your mum and tell her you won’t be coming home. 19. Why not sit on my lap, and we’ll see if anything comes up. 18. Can I check the label on your bra? Why? To see if those tits really are made in heaven. 17. Your daddy must have been a baker, because you have got a great set of buns. 16. Are your legs tired? Why? Because…
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1) The Romans had no letter “U” in their alphabet. 2) The Romans used the letter “V” for “U.” 3) Using the Roman alphabet: CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR becomes CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR. 4) Extracting the Roman numerals from CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR, we get C, V, V, L, D, I, V. 5) Substitute the decimal equivalents for the Roman numerals: C=100, V=5, L=50, D=500, I=1. 6) Add all decimal equivalents: C=100, V=5, V=5, L=50, D=500, I=1, V=5 7) The total of the…
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President Bush is representing the United States of America on a highly formal, orchestrated state visit to England. Air Force One stops at a bright red carpet along which the President strides to join Queen Elizabeth II in a beautiful, ornate 17th-century coach hitched to 6 enormous matched white horses. The coach proceeds through the streets of London en route to Buckingham Palace, the Queen and the President waving to the cheering throngs. Then suddenly the right rear horse produces…
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If you were buying candy and you had your choice of the following, which one would you choose? 1. BABY RUTH 2. 3 MUSKETEERS 3. BUTTER FINGER 4. SNICKERS 5. HERSHEY’S 6. ALMOND JOY 7. CLARK BAR 8. GOOD’N’PLENTY 9. ENERGY BAR 10. CHOCOLATE COVERED RAISINS OK — Now that you have chosen, here’s what research says about you: Don’t scroll down until you’ve made your choice! No, you can’t change your mind once you scroll! So think carefully! :…
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How do you confuse a blonde boy? You put him in a circular room and tell him to pee in the corner. Why do blondes wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm. Why did eighteen blondes go to the movies? Because the sign said, “Seventeen and under not admitted.” What do you call a blonde holding a dollar over her head All you can eat under a buck A dumb blonde and a smart blonde jump off of a roof.…
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Four surgeons were sitting around a table, talking about which type of people they like to operate on. “I like to operate on librarians,” says the first one. “When you open them up, everything is in alphabetical order.” “I like to operate on accountants,” said the second one. “When you open them up, they are in numerical order.” “I like to operate on engineers.” said the third one. “They will understand if you end up with some extra parts.” The…
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Hillery Clinton and St. Peter were taking a walk in heaven one day. Hillery noticed all these clocks around. She asked,”What are all these clocks for?” St. Peter replied,”For every lie someone tells, their clock advances one minute. See, over there? That is Abe Lincoln’s clock. He only told two lies in his life. His clock reads: two after twelve.” Then Hillery asked,”Where is my husbands clock, where’s Bill’s clock?” Peter replied,”That is in Jesus’s office, he uses it for…
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It was the first day of Grade Three in a new town for Dave. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn’t get past 20. Dave, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home ahd told…
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