Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
This little old lady lives New York and after a long day goes home to her hotel. She passes the doorman and heads for the elevator. She pushes her floor, number 15, and the elevator begins to rise, but eventually stops on the third floor. Suddenly, this beautiful brunette walks into the elevator. As the elevator resumes ascending, the old lady begins sniffing the brunette. The brunette tosses her hair back and says, “Calvin Klein, $75 an ounce.” The elevator…
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“Did you hear what happened?” Jim asked, when he saw me walking down the hallway at work. “Hear what?” I asked, my curiosity peaked. “The Regional Vice President died this morning!” “What?!!” I asked, totally stunned. “What happened?” “He was working through lunch when he had a heart attack,” Jim began explaining. “Everyone was gone except his secretary. You know the one.” “Boy, do I! She’s that young blonde babe.” “Yeah, that’s the one. Turns out she isn’t too smart,…
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1. Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out of the fountain. 2. Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big. 3. Dial 900 numbers from demonstration phones in Radio Shack. 4. Sneeze on the sample tray at Hickory Farms and helpfully volunteer to consume its now unwanted contents. 5. At the bottom of an escalator, scream ‘MY SHOELACES! AAAGH!’ 6. Ask the sales personnel at the music store whether inflated CD…
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Q. What is every blonde’s ambition in life? A. To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.
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10. “I hold this truth to be self-evident — you’re a babe.” 9. “I’ve just gone through a terrible break-up with Betsy Ross and I don’t think I should be alone tonight.” 8. “Some people call me the ‘Fondling Father’.” 7. “You know what they say about men with big signatures.” 6. “My teeth aren’t the only thing made of wood.” 5. “If somebody ever invents the telephone, can I give you a call?” 4. “All men are not created…
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A True Story, if she had killed herself she’d be a shoe-in for the Darwin Award (might be a problem in the gene pool). Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, a blonde, new to boating was having a problem. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t get her brand new 22-ft Bayliner to perform. It wouldn’t get on a plane at all, and it was very sluggish in…
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English in Non-English Speaking Countries! Examples of how English is being used in different parts of the world: In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In…
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A boy is sitting in class one morning when his teacher says to the class, “Okay kids, I’m going to say a letter of the alphebet, and you have to tell me a word that begins with that letter.” “A” She says first, looks around at the hands and picks the boy, “Jimmy?” “Ass!” The boy shouts. “Jimmy, one more like that and I won’t pick you. Next, B” She looks around and Jimmy is the only one with his…
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A couple was invited to a masked Halloween Party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping for an hour, awakened feeling much better so she decided to go to the party. Since her husband didn’t know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching him to see how he acted when she was…
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Then: Long hair Now: Longing for hair Then: Keg Now: EKG Then: Acid rock Now: Acid reflux Then: Moving to California because it’s cool. Now: Moving to California because it’s hot. Then: Watching John Glenn’s historic flight with your parents. Now: Watching John Glenn’s historic flight with your kids (grandkids). Then: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor. Now: Trying not to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor. Then: Seeds and stems. Now: Roughage. Then: Popping pills,…
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