Peace Jokes - page 2

ya mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yo mamma — THE LIST YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll…

(7)Loading...

Read Jokeya mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Goodbye, Charlie

When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the American Ambassador to France threw a gala dinner party at the Embassy in his honor. At the dinner table, the Ambassador’s wife was chatting with Madame deGaulle. “Madame,” she began, “Your husband has been such a prominent figure in the world for so long, first as a great General, then as President of the Republic, now as a statesman, what are you most looking forward to in your retirement years?”…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeGoodbye, Charlie

Gabriel’s Horn

It was time for Father John’s Saturday night bath, and young nun, Sister Magdalene had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Fr. John’s nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray. The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone. Oh, sister,” said the young nun dreamily. “I’ve been…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeGabriel’s Horn

map of the middle east

The little old man rubs the lamp and the genie appears. The little old man unrolls a map and says “see this map? It’s the Middle East. My wish is that all the people in all the countries on this map could live in peace forever.” The genie says, “No way can I do that. It’s too much for me. You got another wish?” The little old man says, “Well, in that case maybe you could fix it so my…

(0)
Loading...

Read Jokemap of the middle east

Camping Adventures

Two guys go on a camping trip up into the mountains, and they have a wonderful time. By about the fourth day, however, they’ve run out of things to talk about and are starting to get on each others nerves. So on the fourth night, as they’re having dinner, one of the guys makes a suggestion to his friend. “Look, we’ve been having a pretty good time up here, but let’s face it…after four days together we’ve run out of…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeCamping Adventures

Santa Claus is a WOMAN!

I think Santa Claus is a woman…. I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he’s a she. Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off! For starters, the vast majority of men don’t even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. It’s as if they are all frozen in some kind of ebenezerian Time…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeSanta Claus is a WOMAN!

Saddam, Bill, and the small red buttons.

The peace talks are in progress. Saddam invites Bill over to Bagdahd to talk. Halfway through the talks, Saddam presses a small red button on his chair. Suddenley, a boxing glove flies through the air and hits Bill right on the nose. “Ah Crap!” whines Bill “Why d’ya do that?” Saddam just laughs. After about 10 more minutes of the peace talks, Saddam pushes another small red button on his chair. From underneath the table, a big boot comes out…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeSaddam, Bill, and the small red buttons.

My Resignation

To share to whom it may concern: I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an eight-year-old again. I want to go to McDonald’s and think that its a four star restaurant. I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks. I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them. I want to lie under a…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeMy Resignation

A Sign From Above

A woman and a man get into a car accident, and it’s a bad one. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, “So you’re a man,that’s interesting. I’m a woman… Wow! Just look at our cars. There’s nothing left,but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeA Sign From Above