Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A blonde goes to her first football game with her boyfriend. At halftime her boyfriend asks her, “So what do you think?” The blonde replies “It’s pretty cool but I don’t get why they are fighting over a quarter” he asks, “What do you mean?” She answers, “Every time one of the teams has the ball the other is yelling, “GET THE QUARTER BACK!”
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Two elderly, excited women were sitting together in the front pew of church listening to a fiery preacher. When this preacher condemned the sin of lust, these two ladies cried out at the tops of their lungs…”AMEN, BROTHER!” When the preacher condemned the sin of stealing, they yelled again…”PREACH IT, REVEREND!” And when the preacher condemned the sin of lying…they jumped to their feet and screamed, “RIGHT ON, BROTHER…TELL IT LIKE IT IS…AMEN!” But when the preacher condemned the sin…
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An elderly spinster called a lawyer’s office and told the receptionist she wanted to see the lawyer about having a will prepared. The receptionist suggested they set up an appointment for a convenient time for the spinster to come into the office. The woman replied, “You must understand, I’ve lived alone all my life, I rarely see anyone, and I don’t like to go out. Would it be possible for the lawyer to come to my house?” The receptionist checked…
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A tourist was passing through a small town one day. He went into a tavern to get a beer and he saw all the locals sitting around shouting out numbers and laughing. He asked a man at the table next to him what was going on. The guy answered “We’ve been telling the same jokes over and over for years now, so for convenience we’ve numbered all our jokes. We simply yell out the number instead of telling the entire…
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Three men stand before St. Peter awaiting admission into Heaven. However, St. Peter has been informed that Heaven will only admit 33% of applicants today. The admissions standard: Who died the worst death? So, St. Peter takes each of the three men aside in turn and asks them about how they died. First man: “I’d been suspecting for a long time that my wife was cheating on me. I decided to come home early from work one afternoon and check…
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A modest man is in the hospital for a series of tests. One of the last tests has left his system upset. Upon making several false alarms to the bathroom he decided the latest was another. He completely filled his bed up with human waste and was embarrased beyond anything he could possibly face. Losing his presence of mind, he jumped up, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window. A drunk was walking by the…
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Back in the olden days, a man was traveling through Switzerland. Nightfall was rapidly approaching, and the man had nowhere to sleep. He went up to a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night. The farmer told him that it would be all right, and that he could sleep in the barn. The man went into the barn to bed down and the farmer went back into the house. The farmer’s daughter came down from upstairs…
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A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. The husband yells, “When you die, I’m getting you a headstone that reads, ‘Here Lies My Wife–Cold as Ever!’” “Yeah? Well, when you die, I’m getting YOU a headstone that reads, ‘Here Lies My Husband–Stiff at Last!’”
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A lady on her first visit to Yellowstone National Park said to her guide, “Look at all those big rocks! Wherever did they come from?” “The glaciers brought them down,” said the guide. “But where are the glaciers now?” asked the lady. “The glaciers,” said the guide in a weary voice, “have gone back for more rocks.” “Oh,” said the lady.
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Yo Mamma so stupid, she chased the school bus down yelling, “Stop that Twinkie!!!”
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