Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There was once a man who couldn’t speak. Everyday, he prayed for God to give him a voice. One day God decided to answer the man’s prayers, so He sprayed Holy Water on the man, miraculously giving him the ability to speak. The man’s first words were: “Who the fuck sprayed water on me!”
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While working on a lesson in world religions, a kindergarten teacher asked her students to bring something related to their family’s faith to class. At the appropriate time, she asked the students to come forward and share with the rest of the students. The first child said, “I am Muslim, and this is my prayer rug.” The second child said, “I am Jewish, and this is the Star of David.” The third child said, “I am Catholic, and this is…
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The parents of a newborn son were devastated to learn that their baby was born with a golden screw in his navel. Surgeons had never seen this before, and fearing it would harm the boy, refused to operate. The parents were very religious and accepted the birth defect as God’s will. The mother never gave up faith, and as her son grew up she prayed daily for God to cure him. The boy was very shy, always hiding his golden-screw…
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During World War II, Private Goldstein was anxious to get married before going overseas, but he was stationed in a small town in South Carolina and couldn’t get a furlough. His fiancee, Becky, was perfectly willing to come to South Carolina, and did so; but once there, a difficult problem arose. Becky was a pious girl and insisted on being married by an Orthodox Jewish rabbi. In the small town where Goldstein was stationed, however, there were no Jews, let…
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A naive wife, ever the gracious hostess, was serving drinks at a party over the holidays. A friend of the couple brought his brother who had just been ordained a Priest. She offered the friend a drink from the tray and turned to the Priest and said, “I’m so sorry Father, I’ll go right back to the kitchen and bring you a Coke.” The Priest smiled and said, “No need. I may have alcohol. Priests abstain from sex, not the…
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This voluptuous young blonde owns a small hairy dog that goes by the name of Titswiggle. She adores the dog so much that she treats it as one of the family. One day, after coming home from work, she discovers her beloved dog has run away from home. Frantically she goes around the neighborhood searching every nook and cranny and calling out her dog’s name. She is so desperate that she resorts to knocking on the doors of her neighbors’…
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1. Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out of the fountain. 2. Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big. 3. Dial 900 numbers from demonstration phones in Radio Shack. 4. Sneeze on the sample tray at Hickory Farms and helpfully volunteer to consume its now unwanted contents. 5. At the bottom of an escalator, scream ‘MY SHOELACES! AAAGH!’ 6. Ask the sales personnel at the music store whether inflated CD…
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Some classic answers from Irish radio Just-a-minute quiz. Actual answers given to the bould Larry Gogan (Irish Radio Presenter). 1) Something a blind man might use? A Sword 2) A Song with the word Moon in the title? Blue Suede Moon 3) Name the Capital of France? F 4) Name a bird with a long neck? Naomi Campbell 5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch? A burglar 6) Where is the Taj Mahal? Opposite the Dental Hospital…
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1.At dinner, guard your plate with fork and steak knife, so as to give the impression that you’ll stab anyone, including the waiter, who reaches for it. 2.Collect the salt shakers from all of the tables in the restaurant, and balance them in a tower on your table. 3.Wipe your nose on your date’s sleeve. Twice. 4.Make funny faces at other patrons, then sneer at their reactions. 5.Repeat every third third word you say say. 6.Give your claim to fame…
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A priest went into a Washington, D.C. barbershop and got his hair cut. He then asked asked how much he owed the barber. “No charge, Father,” the barber said. “I consider it a service to the Lord.” when the barber arrived at his shop the next morning, he found a dozen small prayer booklets on the stoop along with a thank you note from the priest. A few days later, a police officer came in. “How much do I owe…
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