Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There once was a poor lad named Timmy who had the misfortune of being born with only a head — no arms, no legs, nothing but a head. Now Timmy was a basically happy person and he was loved and cared for by his family. As long as he stayed within the shelter of his family he was unworried by his condition, but as soon as he was thrust out into the world he knew that something was seriously wrong.…
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OFFICIAL BABY BOOMER EXAM Answers below 1. “Kookie; Kookie. Lend me your ________________.” 2. The “battle cry” of the hippies in the sixties was “Turn on; tune in;________________.” 3. After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, “Who was that masked man?” Invariably, someone would answer, “I don’t know, but he left this behind.” What did he leave behind?__________________ 4. Folk songs were played side by side with rock and…
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A guy is strolling down the street in Chicago where he comes across an old lamp. He picks it up, rubs it vigorously, and out pops a genie. The genie offers to grant him one wish, to which the guy replies “I’ve always wanted to be lucky.” The genie grants his wish. So off the guy strolls, wondering how this will change his life, when he spies 10 dollars on the sidewalk. Not a bad start he thinks. As he…
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I recently had the honour of interviewing the Prime Minister of Britain. Here is than interview PM: Could you please untie me? (coughs loudly) Me: Perhaps later. What exactly is wrong with you? PM: I think I’ve caught the flu from the president. Me: So you’ve been kissing him again? PM: No! Me: So you’ve stopped kissing him then? PM: No! Er I mean yes, I mean-… Me: (interrupting) Is your relationship serious? PM: No, I didn’t mean that? Me:…
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Everyday I give thanks to the Goddess I have two mounds upon my bodice I shave my legs, sit down to pee – Can justify any shopping spree Don’t go to a barber, but a beauty salon Can get a massage without a hard-on I can balance my checkbook, can pump my own gas Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass My beauty’s a masterpiece, and yes, it takes long. At least I can admit to…
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“Doctor’s Office Etiquette” A man walked into a crowded doctor’s office. As he approached the desk, the receptionist asked, “Yes sir, may we help you?” “There’s something wrong with my dick,” he replied. The receptionist became aggravated and said, “You shouldn’t come into a crowded office and say things like that.” “Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you,” he said. “We do not use language like that here,” she said. “Please go outside and come…
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Isn’t it obvious? Can’t you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the “other side.” That’s what “they” call it the “other side.” Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes…
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If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him – Is he still wrong? If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? Is there another word for synonym? Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice?” When you open a bag of cotton balls,…
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There was an egg in a pub and a woman comes over and begins to chat him up. They have a dance and at the end of the night the woman asks him if he wants to go back to her place. He says ‘OK’ so he collects his bag and leaves. When they get to her house she says, ‘I’m just going to slip into something more comfortable’ She returns wearing a small purple garment. The egg who always…
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One day a guy was out doing yard work when his very attractive blonde female neighbor came stomping outside, walked to her mailbox, opened the door, slammed it shut, and stomped back in. A few minutes later the blonde stomped outside, walked to her mailbox, opened the door, looked in and slammed the door shut again. This continued 3 or 4 more times. The last time the blonde flung open her door, marched to the mailbox flung open the mailbox…
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