Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A knockout young lady decided she wanted to get rich quick so she proceeded to find herself a rich 73-year-old man, planning to love him to death on their wedding night. The courtship and wedding went off without any problem, in spite of the half-century age difference. The first night of her honeymoon, she got undressed, and waited for him to come out of the bathroom to come to bed. When he emerged, however, he had nothing on except a…
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A farmer decided it was time to take a wife, so he went to the city and found a woman who agreed to marry him. The only problem was she knew absolutely nothing about farming, and told him that. He told her not to worry, he would handle all the farm things. One day, a few years later, the Farmer told his wife that the next morning he would have to go to town. He told her that the vet…
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An elderly woman went into the doctor’s office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, “I’d like to have some birth control pills.” Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, “Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you’re 72 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?” The woman responded, “They help me sleep better.” The doctor thought some more and continued, “How in the world do birth control pills help…
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The old couple were planning to go on a second honeymoon for their 50th wedding anniversary. The old woman said, “We will go to all the same places that we did on our first honeymoon.” “Uh huh,” said the old man. “We will do all the things that we did on our first honeymoon,” said the old woman. “Uh huh,” said the old man. “And we will make love like we did on our first honeymoon,” said the old woman.…
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Today’s woman puts on wigs, fake eyelashes, false fingernails, sixteen pounds of assorted make-up/shadows/blushes/creams, living bras, various pads that would make a linebacker envious, has implants and assorted other surgeries, then complains that she cannot find a “real” man.
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A medieval Jewish astrologer prophesied to a king that his favorite mistress would soon die. Sure enough, the woman died a short time later. The kind was outraged at the astrologer, certain that his prophecy had brought about the woman’s death. He summoned the astrologer and gave him this command: “Prophet, tell me when you will die!” The astrologer realized that the king was planning to kill him, immediately, no matter what answer he gave. So he said, finally, “I…
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A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an inspection of the place. The farmer had genuinely tried to be friendly to his new mother-in-law, hoping that it could be a friendly, non-antagonistic relationship. All to no avail though, as she kept nagging them at every opportunity, demanding changes, offering unwanted advice, and generally making life unbearable to the farmer and his new bride. While they were walking through the barn, during the forced…
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At Frederick’s of Hollywood a husband wants to buy his wife the sheerest lingerie he can find. “This is $200,” says the saleswoman, showing him an item. “I want one that’s more sheer,” says he. “This one is $350.” “Sheerer than that.” “This is the sheerest we have. It’s $500.” “I’ll take it!” he replies. The man goes home to his wife and shows it to her, saying, “Go put this on and come down to model it for me.”…
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Twenty-four hours in a day, twenty-four beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not! Last words spoken at the Last Supper: “Everyone who wants to be in the picture, get on this side of the table.” Why are there so many Smiths and Johnsons in the phone book? They all have phones. A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother. Shouldn’t there be a shorter word for “monosyllabic?” Did you know that half of…
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Two guys go on a camping trip up into the mountains, and they have a wonderful time. By about the fourth day, however, they’ve run out of things to talk about and are starting to get on each others nerves. So on the fourth night, as they’re having dinner, one of the guys makes a suggestion to his friend. “Look, we’ve been having a pretty good time up here, but let’s face it…after four days together we’ve run out of…
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