Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A skinhead type gets on the bus with an orange Mohawk cut all spiked out, green side burns, the whole bit. Another more conventional and a generation older man can’t take his eyes of him. Finally the skinhead says, “What’s the matter, old man? Can’t stand something different?” The man replies kindly, “Oh no! It’s just that I screwed a parrot once and you may be my son.”
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The North has sun-dried toe-mah-toes The South has ‘mater samiches The North has coffeehouses The South has Waffle Houses The North has dating services The South has family reunions The North has switchblade knives The South has Lee Press-on Nails The North has double last names The South has double first names The North has Ted Kennedy The South has Jesse Helms The North has an ambulance The South has an amblance The North has the Mafia, The South has…
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A man walks in the doctors with a carrot sticking out of his ear, spaggeti all over his hair, and corn flakes down his front. The doctor says you haven’t been eating properly have you?
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Elderly Harry was in the hospital. Every time this young nurse came in, she talked to him like a little child. She would say, in a very patronizing tone of voice, “And how are we doing this morning??!!!” Well, this a story of revenge. Harry had received breakfast, pulled the juice off the tray and put it on his stand. He had been given a Urine bottle to fill. The juice was apple, and you know what Harry did with…
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An Englishman returns home late one night to find his wife in bed with three men. The stunned Brit says, “‘allo, ‘allo, ‘allo!” His wife the replies, “What? Aren’t you talkin’ to me?”
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A liberal kindergarten teacher taught a class of thirty. On election day, she asked the students to raise their hand if they were Democrats. 29 students raised their hands. She asked the kid with his hand down if he was a Republican. “Yes”, the boy replied. The teacher asked why and the boy said because his parents were. “Well if your parents are total morons, what does that make you?” “A Democrat.”
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There were two boll weevils from Kentucky. One moved away to Hollywood and became a big movie star with millions of dollars. He was known as the successful weevil. The other one stayed at home and worked on the farm. He made a decent living but wasn’t as successful as the other. Therefore he was known as the lesser of two weevils.
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After several hours of reading the directions, attempting to fit bolt A into slot B, etc., this father finally gave up and called upon an old handyman working in a neighboring yard. The old-timer came over, threw away the directions, and in a short while, had the set completely assembled. “It’s beyond me,” said the father, “how you got it together without even reading the instructions.” “To tell you the truth,” replied the old-timer, “I can’t read, and when you…
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True Facts About Americans Only 30% of us can flare our nostrils. 21% of us don’t make our bed daily. 5% of us never do. Men do 29% of laundry each week. Only 7% of women trust their husbands to do it correctly. 40% of women have hurled footwear at a man. 85% of men don’t use the slit in their underwear. 67.5% of men were tightie whities (briefs). The average bra size today is 36C whereas 10 years ago…
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1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they?re heading for the cafeteria. People with the newspaper in their hands look like they?re heading for the bathroom. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you work longer hours than you do.…
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