Wild one Jokes - page 7

The three Ninjas

There was a contest held in Japan, the contest was between three Ninjas from different countries. There was a Japanese Ninja, an American Ninja and a Trinidadian Ninja. The contest was who can chop flies the best. So the Japanese Ninja went first, the fly came flying about and in a flash the Japanese Ninja chopped the fly in half with one strike, the crowed went wild. The American Ninja went next and with great speed and skill the fly…

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Toilet Paper and Telecommunication

A nerdy guy walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a couple of drinks. As the bartender is handing him a beer, the guy starts poking at this hand with one finger, and then holds his hand up to his ear and starts talking to it. The bartender is quite bewildered by this, so he says, “What are you doing?” “Well,” says the nerdy guy,” I am a CEO for a top telecommunications company. I have a digital…

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Little Old Ladies

Once upon a time there was a little old man who really took care of his body. He lifted weights and jogged six miles every day. One morning he looked into the mirror and was admiring his body (it’s a man thing), when he noticed that he was suntanned over his entire body with the exception of his penis. He decided to do something about it. He promptly went to the beach, completely undressed, and buried himself in the sand,…

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When it rains, it pours …

A man was sitting alone at the bar looking so sad and forlorn. He had a glass of beer in front of him but he did not touch the glass for more than half an hour. Just then a burly, mean biker approached the sad man, grabbed the glass and drank all the content. As the biker wiped off the beer suds from his mouth, the man began to cry. The biker laughed and said, “Hey, man, I was just…

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How to respond to e-mail ads….

You know those “special offers” that “you would be CRAZY to turn down”? Here’s how you might wish to respond to them: —————————————- To Whom It May Concern: Thank you for your recent e-mail to me. It was good hearing from you and reading your advertisement As information, I am a reasonably healthy male, over 40 years of age. If you sent me the ad/offer regarding how I may “enlarge my breasts,” I think I’ll pass, if you don’t mind.…

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What he says, What he really means

“Haven’t I seen you before?” “Nice ass.” “I’m a Romantic.” “I’m poor.” “I need you” “My hand is tired.” “I am different from all the other guys” “I am not circumcised.” “I really want to get to know you better.” “So I can tell my friends about it.” “It’s just orange juice, try it.” “3 more shots, and she’ll have her legs around my head.” “She’s kinda cute.” “I want to have sex with her till I am blue.” “I…

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Proposal Agreement

I, the undersigned, a male proposing marriage agree that? Section 1. In the likely event of my not giving you an orgasm, will keep on going, despite my lack of stamina and size until you have been satisfied. Section 1.01. I?ll behave myself in a mature manner and fight the temptation to scream ?Who?s your daddy? and grunt like a sea lion. Section 1.02. I will never complain about too much foreplay. Section 2. I fully understand that a man?s…

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Redneck trips?

In the back woods of Kentucky, the redneck’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to be a lantern and said, “Here, you hold this high so I can see what I’m doing.” Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. “Whoa there,” said the doctor. “Don’t be in a rush to put the lantern down…I…

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Air Head

A bored blonde decides to do something wild, something she hasn’t done before, so she decides to rent her first X-rated adult video. She goes to the video store and, after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds stimulating. She drives home, opens a bottle of wine, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To her disappointment, there’s nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain. “I…

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Three Three Explorers Meet The Cannibals

Three famous explorers, Dr. Smith, Dr. Doe and Dr. Jones, were on an anthropological excursion into the deepest jungle of Borneo when they were captured by a tribe of head-hunting cannibals. When the three captive explorers were brought into the village, the cannibals’ chief told them, “You all trespassers! We no like trespassers. We eat trespassers. But we very fair. You three take test first. If you pass test, you go away alive. But if you fail, you lose head…

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