Wa wa Jokes - page 432

The Bunny and the Snake

Once upon a time, in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. By surprising coincidence both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down. This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit. “Oh, my,” said the bunny, “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’ve been blind…

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Some selected Puns

Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However, all the league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire. Thus, we’ll never know for whom the Tells bowled. –=[|]=– A marine biologist developed a race of genetically engineered dolphins that could live forever if they were fed a steady diet of seagulls. One day his supply of the birds ran out, so he had to go out and trap some more. On the way back,…

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Brag, Brag, Brag

As I was dropping my son off at daycare the other day, I overheard some of the children talking about their siblings. “My brother takes karate lessons,” bragged one. “My sister takes gymnastics,” said another. Not to be outdone, the youngest piped up, “My sister takes antibiotics.”

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Lawyer Ethics

An attorney had just finished a consultation with an elderly, nearly blind widow, for which he charged her $100. The widow opened her purse and removed a $100 bill. When the lawyer accepted it, he noticed there was another $100 bill stuck to it. Immediately the lawyer’s keen legal mind realized he was faced with a vital ethical question: Should he tell his partner?

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World’s Greatest Charade Player

The world’s greatest charade player brags that he can guess any charade. A TV producer decides to use the charade player in a TV special. He issues a challenge offering the charade player a million dollars to guess a very hard charade on television. The Charade player agrees. Comes the big night, all the world is watching. The charade player is sitting on stage in front of a curtain. Music blares and the curtain opens to reveal seven nude young…

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Blondes with Cows

Not too long ago, everyone in our grade went on a school excusion to the local cow milking station. Everyone was really bored, but then again who can find anything interesting about looking at a whole lot of cows being milked except for one girl who had a really confused look on her face. She came up to us, and said, “Do you mind if I ask you a question?” Naturally we said no, not expecting anything too funny (we…

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Dear God,

Dear God, Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? Norma Dear God, Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones,why don’t you just keep the ones you have now? Jane Dear God, Who draws the lines around the countries? Nan Dear God, I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? Neil Dear God, Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed…

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Old Lady’s Dates

An old lady tells her pastor, “I’m a very active old lady. I meet with three men every day.” To this the pastor exclaims, “Three! Well, who are these lucky men?” “Well, I wake up and Will Power is there to help me to wake up. During the day, he stays with me, until Arthur Itis comes in. He is very active, and we move from joint to joint. Then, Ben Gay and I live it up in bed for…

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Dying Becky

Becky was on her deathbed, with her husband Jake at her side. He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face. Her pale lips moved. “Jake,” she said. “Hush,” he quickly interrupted, “don’t talk.” But, she insisted. “Jake,” she said in her tired voice, “I have to talk. I must confess.” “There is nothing to confess,” said the weeping Jake, “It’s all right. Everything’s all right.” “No, no. I must die in peace. I must confess, Jake,…

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