Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A dwarf goes to a farmer one day and tells him, “I’d like to buy a horth.” The farmer is in a hurry to get somewhere but tells him, “Okay, I’ll quickly show you this horse but I got to get going.” The dwarf looks at the horse and says, “Can I thee her eyeth? You can tell a lot about a horth from her eyeth.” The farmer picks up the dwarf and the dwarf looks at the horse’s eyes.…
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The graduate with a Science degree asks, “Why does it work?” The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, “How does it work?” The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, “How much will it cost?” The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, “Do you want fries with that?”
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The missionaries were doing their best to convert the local Indians, and to stop their consumption of liquor but to no avail. Finally they introduced them to tea. Iced tea, hot tea, etc. The Indians loved it! They drank it every morning, every afternoon, evenings. It was great! Soon tho, it seemed to get out of hand. All this tea drinking, all the time… even at their parties and pow-wows. One pow-wow in particular it seemed they must’ve overdone it.…
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A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: “For Women Only”. Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The doorman, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. “We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It’s easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you…
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WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF STAR WARS WAS SET IN GLASGOW? Chewbacca would look roughly the same except he’d only be about 5ft tall, from Blackhill and called Shug. He’d have the same amount of body hair but would also have tattoos, would permanently smell of drink and invariably sport a Rangers top. Obi-Wan Kenobi would invariably be referred to as Chief or Big Yin by his cohorts. People trying to start a fight with him would addess him as Wanky-Nobby.…
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Here’s a little tip from an experienced traveler. A wake-up call is the worst way to wake up. The phone rings; it’s so loud; you can’t turn it down. So leave the number of the room next to you. Then you’ll hear a muffled ring, and you hear a guy yell, “What are you calling ME for?” Then you get up and take a shower. It’s great!
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“How to Keep the Wackiness Alive in the Modern Workplace, Part I” ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you’re waiting for your document. Arrive at a meeting late, say you’re sorry, but you didn’t have time for lunch, and you’re going to be nibbling during he meeting. During the meeting, eat 5 entire raw potatoes. Insist that your e-mail address be “[email protected]” Every time someone asks you to do something, ask him/her…
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This memo is to announce the development of a new software system which will be Year 2000 compliant. This program is known as “Millennia Year Application Software System” (MYASS). Next Monday there will be a meeting in which I will show MYASS to everyone. We will hold demonstrations throughout the month so that all employees will have an opportunity to get a good look at MYASS. We have not addressed networking aspects yet, so currently only one person at a…
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1.Your bartender knows you better than your own mom. 2.You have worked 12 different jobs in the last 2 months. 3.Everything you own is in the pawn shop. 4.You have to check the gas and fill the oil in your car. 5.Your last date was on the spice channel.
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A Jehova’s Witness knocked on the front door of a home, and heard a faint, high pitched, “Come In”. He tried the door and it was locked, so he went around to the back door. He knocked again and heard again the high pitched “Come In”. As he entered the kitchen a large, mean, snarling Doberman met him. As he plastered himself against the wall he called out for help. Again, he heard the “Come In”. He slid down the…
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