Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy? Hard work will pay off later. Laziness pays off now! If only women came with pull-down menus and on-line help. When blondes have more fun, do they know it? What happens if you get scared half to death twice? The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson. Four out of five people think the fifth is an idiot. Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking? A hangover is…
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Day 1. Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary with not much to celebrate. When it came time to reenact our wedding night, he locked himself in the bathroom and cried. Wussy. Day 2. Today, he says he has a big secret to tell me. He’s impotent, he says, and he wants me to be the first to know. Why doesn’t he tell me something I don’t know! I mean, gimme a break. He’s been dysfunctional for so long that he…
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Wife: Oh, Baby, I’m soooooooo hot. Husband: Go to sleep, Honey, I have to get up early. Wife: It won’t take long. Husband: It’ll wake me up. I won’t be able to sleep afterwards. Wife: I won’t sleep without it. Husband: Why do you think of things like this in the middle of the night? Wife: Because I’m hot, Sweetie. Husband: Geez, you get hot at the darndest times. Wife: If you loved me, I wouldn’t have to beg. Husband:…
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There were three blondes walking along the beach. While they were walking, they find a geenie. The geenie says that they can each have one wish. The first blonde wishes to be a thousand times smarter, so her hair turns light brown and she becomes a brain surgeon. the secound one wishes to be a million times smarter and her hair gets a really dark brown and she finds a cure for cancer. The third blonde wishes to be a…
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For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he’d finally managed an affair with the innkeeper’s daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her lap! “Helen, why didn’t you write when you learned you were pregnant?” he cried. “I would have rushed up here, we could have…
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An incompentent counterfeiter spent all day making his funny money. At the end of the day he realizes he spent all his time making $15 bills. He figures that the only way he’s going to get anything from this batch of money, is to find a place where the people aren’t too bright and change his phoney money for real cash. He travels to a small town in West Virginia and walks into a small Mom and Pop grocery store.…
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Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur?s youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed. The question was: What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the…
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Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it’s annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do, wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they’ll…
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A man walks into a bar and says, “Bartender, give me two shots. One for me and one for my best buddy.” Bartender says, “You want them both now or do you want me to wait until your buddy arrives to pour his?” The guy says, “Oh, I want them both now. I’ve got my best buddy in my pocket here.” He then pulls a little 3 inch man out of his pocket. The bartender asks, “You mean to say,…
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To test the “Stupidity Quotient” of your friends, the next time you are outdoors with a friend, shout: “Oh, my God, there is a dead bird !” If your friend looks UP and says, “Where?” you will know that tree bark probably has more brain cells!
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