Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Th th Jokes - page 592
BLONDE SECRETARY
A blonde secretary joins her boss on a business trip. They arrive the night before and stay in a hotel. She is told to meet him at the meeting at 9:00am the next day. One and a half hours into the meeting the boss calls his secretary to find out why she has not shown up? The boss: “You are 1 1/2 hours late! Why are you not here?” The secretary: “Well I am having a little bit of trouble…
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Snow White
Snow White decides to take a shower and the dwarfs want to peek. They stand on each others shoulders and the guy on top is supposed to convey whats happening. He yells: “She’s taking off her dress”. On down you hear, she’s taking off her dress, she’s taking off her dress. He yells: “She’s taking off her panties”. On down it goes, she’s taking off her panties, she’s taking off her panties. He yells: “She’s taking off her bra”. On…
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Some funny blonde jokes
Q & A Q:How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? A:Tell him a joke on Thursday. Q:A blonde is going to London on a plane, how can you steal her window seat? A:Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row. Q:Why did God give blondes 2% more brains than horses? A:Because he didn’t want them shitting in the streets during parades. Q:Why can’t blondes make ice cubes? A:They always forget the…
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Stroke
“It’s happened,” cried the bishop in anguish as he sat playing bridge one evening with some charming people. “What’s happened?” asked the young woman next to him. “A stroke! My left side is paralyzed.” “Are you sure?” asked the young lady. “Yes, yes,” groaned the bishop. “I’ve been pinching my left leg for the past few minutes and feel no sensation whatsoever.” “Relax,” said the young lady. “That was MY leg you were pinching!”
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Stupid Digging
During the Persian Gulf War, my Marine Corps unit had to dig foxholes every time we changed positions. Once, when a private was making his trench, he complained to our sergeant, “Why do we have to do this stupid digging?” Then there was a loud explosion just a hundred feet away. “What was THAT?” asked the private. “That,” replied the sergeant, “is called ‘incentive’.”
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saggy
An old English couple was getting ready for bed when the husband said, “Honey, I love when you take off your blouse!” Blushing, the wife said, “Thank you.” The husband continued, “Honey, I love when you take off your bra!” “Even after all these years?” the wife asked. “Yes,” he replied. “Because then all the wrinkles come off of your face!!”
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10 cents
A man had a big dance comming up but the problem was he didn’t know how to dance. So he went to a dance studio. The instructor told him to pretend that there is a 10 cent piece on his right shoulder and that he must try to touch the coin with his earlobe in time to the music. So the guy went home and practiced this all week long. The next week the instructor told him to do the…
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Bald Heads
A man who had the misfortune of being totally bald was naturally teased about it at times. A friend ran his hand over the bald head and said, “It feels just like my wife’s behind.” The bald man passed his own hand over his head and said, “My God, so it does!”
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A Kiss & A Slap
A young Marine and his commanding officer board a train headed through the mountains of Switzerland. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother. After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young soldier are interested in each other because they are giving each other “looks.” Soon, the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound…
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