Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Gals, when someone asks, “Why aren’t you married?” Here are some suggested retorts: “You haven’t asked yet.” “I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life.” “What? And spoil my great life?” “Nobody would believe me in white.” “Because I just love hearing this question.” “Just lucky, I guess.” “It gives my mother something to live for.” “My fiance is awaiting parole.” “I’m still hoping for a shot at Miss America.” “Do you know how hard it is to…
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A worker on a construction site of a high rise building climbed all the way to the top of the building before realizing that he needed a second pair of hands to accomplish the task he had in mind. Not wanting to climb all the way back down, and also realizing that no one would hear him if he yelled, he signaled to the foreman on the ground. He pointed first to himself, then his knee, and then the foreman,…
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A drunk walks into a bar and orders a large beer. After a few moments he stands up and yells, “Attorney’s are assholes.” From the back of the room, another drunk stands up and says, “I resent that”. The first drunk says, “Are you an attorney?” The second drunk says, “No, I’m an asshole.”
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There was this young boy who really liked going fast. So his parents bought him a tricycle. One day his brother came over with his brand new car. The young boy ran up to his brother and begged him to give him a ride in his new, fast car. The brother said “How about this. I’ll tie your tricyle to the back of my car and I’ll pull down the street.” The young boy accepted immediately. The arrangement was that…
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The Top 16 Rejected Motel 6 Slogans 16 We’re working on that smell thing, too. 15 Because you deserve better than the backseat of some car. 14 As seen on “COPS” 13 If we’d known you were staying all night, we’d have changed the sheets. 12 Not just for nooners anymore. 11 We left off the 9, but you know it’s there. 10 You rented the room, now buy the video. 9 Sure, you could stay someplace nicer, but then…
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After the revivals had concluded, the three pastors were discussing the results with one another. The Methodiest minister said, “The revival worked out great for us! We gained four new families.” The Baptist preacher said, “We did better than that! We gained six new families.” The Presbyterian pastor said, “Well, we did even better than that! We got rid of our ten biggest troublemakers!”
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A lady dies and goes to heaven. She arrives at the pearly gates and is greeted by Saint Peter. There are a few people waiting, so she strikes up a conversation with him. Just then, she hears a blood curdling scream! “What was that?” she asks. “Oh, it’s nothing,” says Saint Peter, “It’s just someone getting a hole drilled in their head so they can be fitted for their halo.” A few seconds later, she hears another agonized scream, this…
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There was a man that was going to rob his first bank in his life but he was nervous about doing it. So the next day he went downtown and walked into the bank and said, “Freeze, mother sticker, this is a fuck up!”
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Most of us understand that our self worth and feelings of achievement change as we go through life. While everyone has different aspirations, it appears we all have some common benchmarks for what success is. Really, it all depends on your age. Consider the following… At age 4, success is not peeing your pants At age 16, success is “getting a little” At age 25, success is graduation and a wedding At age 35, success is about career and family…
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Paul and a bunch of other kids ran up to Mrs. Robinson’s house carrying caps, baseball gloves, and bats. Paul shouted up to the window, “Mrs. Robinson! Can Johnny come out to play baseball?” Mrs. Robinson replied, “Paul, you know that Johnny doesn’t have any arms or legs.” Paul shouted back, “We know that. We just want to use him as first base!”
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