Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
When WOMEN say…… Yes = No No = Yes I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry. We need… = I want… It’s your decision = The decision I want you to make should be obvious to you by now. Do whatever you want = You’ll pay for it later. We need to talk = I need to complain. Sure, go ahead = You better not if you know what’s good for you. I’m NOT upset = Of course I’m upset, you…
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CLINTON VIRUS Gives you a 7 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory. VIAGRA VIRUS Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy. LEWINSKY VIRUS Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then emails everyone about what it did. RONALD REAGAN VIRUS Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored. MIKE TYSON VIRUS Quits after two bytes. OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS Your 300 MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 100 MB, then slowly expands to 200MB. DR. JACK…
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How far can a dog run into the woods? Half way because the rest of the way he is running out!
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Secretary:”The Invisible Man is here to meet with you.” Boss:”Tell him I can’t possibly see him!”
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One day a third grade teacher was giving a guessing test to her students. She told them to close their eyes, while she put an item of food in their mouth. She told Bobby to close his eyes and open his mouth. She put an orange slice in his mouth and said, “Tell me what it is.” Bobby said an orange slice. She said, “You win.” She told Jane to do the same and she put a Hershey’s kiss in…
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1. A guitar has a volume knob. 2. If you break a guitar’s G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one. 3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want to. 4. You can unplug a guitar. 5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining. 6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset. 7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested. 8. You can have…
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One day in The Garden Of Eden, Eve was playing near the ocean and accidentally fell in. A loud deep voice was heard from above exclaiming, “Damn! Now I’ll never get the smell out!”
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On a cruise ship touring the Mediterranean, there was a magician who would perform a cabaret act every night in the ship’s bar. Now, also in that bar, there was a parrot, who from his vantage point near the ceiling could see exactly how each trick was done. Every night was the same. Everytime he performed a trick the parrot would yell to the audience how the trick was done: “It’s up his sleeve!” or “Look under the table!” The…
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There was this preacher who was lonely and wanted a companion. So he decided to get a talking parrot. Upon the first day home the parrot says, “Swing the cage, swing the God damn cage.” Stunned and appalled, the preacher took the parrot back to the pet shop where he had bought the parrot. The preacher says to the pet shop owner, “I can’t have this bird cussing in my home I have other preachers and nuns that come to…
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What are the only four animals a woman needs? A mink on her back, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass to pay for it all.
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