Start car Jokes - page 13

The candidate

One day a conservative Presidential candidate decided that he needed more exposure in front of the farming community of the country. So, he set out on his journey across America to visit different agricultural communities. As he was traveling down a dirt road in a small town his eyes fell upon a farmer working out in his field. He decided that this was as good a place as any to start his campaigning, and so he parked his car and…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeThe candidate

Chili Contest

Just recently I was honored to be selected as an Outstanding Famous Celebrity in my community to be a judge at a chili cookoff because no one else wanted to do it. Also, the original person called in sick at the last minute and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy,…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeChili Contest

Buttercups

There are two guys playing golf, and they both hit their balls way into the rough. They agree to go find their balls and meet on the fairway later. The first guy is pretty sure he hit his into the big patch of buttercups, so he goes over and starts beating the hell out of the buttercups with his club looking for his ball. All of a sudden, an angel comes down from heaven and tells him that he can…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeButtercups

Dr. Suessing Clinton & Starr (Revisited)

Mr Starr: I am Starr. Starr I are. I’m a brilliant barri-star. I’m here to ask, as you’ll soon see, Did you grope Miss Lew-in-sky? Did you grope her in your house? Did you grope beneath her blouse? Did she give you gifts and ties? And were you spied by prying eyes? Mr Clinton: I did not do that here or there! I did not do that anywhere! I did not do that in a chair! I went not near…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeDr. Suessing Clinton & Starr (Revisited)

Working Or Not ?

Santasingh and BantaSingh wanted to go camping. They attached the trailer to the car. SantaSingh wanted to make sure that the car is in good condition before they start. So, he asked BantaSingh to go in front of the car to check the head lights. Santa Singh switched the head lights on. BantaSingh said, “Yeah! it is working!”. Then Santa switched on the high beam. Banta told “Yeah! it is working!”. Santa asked Banta to go to the rear side…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeWorking Or Not ?

Top 10 signs Bill Clinton may be

10. Every time you are about to be punished, you start a war with another school. 09. You don’t count an oral report as a report. 08. When you get caught without your homework, you blame it on a “vast, 4th grade conspiracy” 07. When your Mom asks if you’ve done your chores, you respond “that depends on what the meaning of the word ‘done’ is”. 06. You get expelled, and your popularity rating goes up 10%. 05. The day…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeTop 10 signs Bill Clinton may be

Outboard Pushes Suburban

Driving on the highway, I watched a passing Chevy Suburban towing a boat with an outboard motor. The motor was obviously in neutral because the propeller was spinning like crazy from the slip-stream under the car. I turned to my wife, pointed to the boat, and said, tongue in cheek, “Look, that’s a great idea! Those Suburbans are heavy and burn a lot of gas, so this guy started his boat motor so the propeller will help PUSH him!” My…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeOutboard Pushes Suburban

Parachutes and Wings

Little Lulu is travelling in an aeroplane. The aeroplane starts giving problems and it soon becomes clear that all passengers will have to use their parachutes and jump out as the plane is about to crash. Unfortunately there is not sufficient parachutes for all the passengers. Lulu being really brave, decides to hand her parachute to somebody else. The stranger who takes the parachute is quite alarmed to see that Lulu is smiling from ear to ear. “But why are…

(2)Loading...

Read JokeParachutes and Wings

SNAPS

Here’s one for the women: ADD a bed SUBTRACT your clothes DIVIDE your legs so we can MULTIPLY. Yo mama got more extensions than AT&T. Yo mama so fat her blood type is rocky road. Yo mama so old when Moses parted the Red Sea she was taking a swim. Yo family so black if they hold hands they look like a stretch limo. Yo mama so stupid she thought Taco Bell was a phone company. Yo mama so fat…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeSNAPS

golf etiquette

Three guys, a father, son, and grandfather go out to play a round of golf. As they are on the way out to the first tee they are joking, bullshitting, and cussing, very much the men’s day out. Just before the son is ready to tee off, this fine looking woman walks up carrying her clubs. She says that her partner didn’t show and asks if she can join them. The guys say sure, since she is a really beautiful…

(0)
Loading...

Read Jokegolf etiquette