Please wait!
I was standing in a long line at the bank the other day, when an employee, noticing my nervousness, came up to me and said, “I apologize for the long wait.” I said, “No problem, my dear, I’ve got more patience than a hospital.”
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
I was standing in a long line at the bank the other day, when an employee, noticing my nervousness, came up to me and said, “I apologize for the long wait.” I said, “No problem, my dear, I’ve got more patience than a hospital.”
Three men are on an airplane, flying over the ocean. The aircraft is in trouble, and the captain soon comes on over the intercom and says, “Folks, we’re having some serious problems here. I want everyone to assume crash position.” The first guy, after hearing this, he stands up and starts taking off all his clothes. His two friends see this, and say, “Hey! What are you doing that for?” and the man replies, “I’m not a very good swimmer,…
Q: What is the first thing that goes through a bug’s mind as it hits your windshield? A: Its ass
Little Johnny’s teacher asked the class if they had ever heard the word “contagious” before. Little Susie put up her hand and proceded to tell the class that when somebody has the chicken pox they are contagious. Her mummy said so. Next was little Robert. He told the class that contagious was when somebody has got the measles. Then little Johnny stood up to set them all right. “You’re both wrong. The other day I was sitting on the porch…
There were two guys, Bob and Joe. Now Bob and Joe LOVED hockey, and they went to hockey games every weekend. And every Saturday after the games they searched the parking lot, not remembering where they parked their car. One day Bob decided he had a brilliant idea, and he was going to surprise Joe. That morning when he went to pick up Joe for the game, he was riding on a donkey. Joe looked at him with complete amazement…
Maybe you can assist me with a problem which I’m having with a friend. She owns a used furniture store, and a few weeks ago the store was burglarized. The only thing taken was a big, beautiful, high-back fabric sofa, valued at over $1,000. My friend was devastated, as it was the finest used item in the entire store. Police speculate that it was the only item stolen, simply because the thieves were not able to carry anything else out…
Exhausted from driving, the traveling salesman stopped in this one town and pulled over to get an hour or two of sleep. But, as luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be one of the streets that the majority of the town’s people used to take their daily run. The salesman had barely pulled over and gotten comfortable when a jogger was knocking on his window, asking, “Excuse me, but do you have the time?” The…
HONOR SYSTEM VIRUS: This virus works on the honor system. Please delete all the files on your hard disk, then forward this message to everyone you know. Thank you for your cooperation.
Once there were two twins, Joe and John. Joe was the owner of a dilapidated old boat. It so happened that John’s wife died the same day that Joe’s boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Joe and mistook him for John. She said, “I am sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible.” Joe, thinking that she was talking about the boat, said, “Heck no, in fact, I’m sort of glad to…
A customer asked the waitress what the daily special was. She replied, “Boiled tongue.” “BOILED TONGUE!” responded the horrified customer. “There is certainly no way that I would ever eat anything that came out of a cow’s mouth! That’s disgusting!! Give me three fried eggs, instead!