Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Three Italian mothers were attending a football game. Each had a son playing on the same team. At the start of the game, the first boy saw his opportunity, grabbed the ball and running quickly, out-foxed the opposing team, making the first touchdown. His mother, obviously proud of her son, sprang from the bleachers, shouting in her broken Italian accent, “Thatsa *my* boy! I raised him onna de Pet milk. Ain’t he-a Peach?” Soon, the second boy received the ball…
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A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labor is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. “I’m afraid I don’t have a husband,” she replies. “OK, do you have a boyfriend?” asks the Midwife. “No, no boyfriend either.” “Do you have a partner then?” “No, I’m unattached; I’ll be having my baby on my own.” After the birth, the midwife again speaks to the young woman. “You have…
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I hope when I die that I’ll die in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming like his passengers.
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It was early one Saturday morning. A friend of mine called to warn me of a group of Jehovah Witnesses working our neighborhood. I thought it would be funny if I appeared at the door totally nude and holding a beer. I looked out the window and saw a man in a suit, a well-dressed woman and two young girls carrying what looked like a bag. As soon as the doorbell rang, I opened it. Acting very drunk, I asked…
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A young man wished to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart for Christmas, and as they had not been dating very long, he decided a pair of gloves would be appropriate… romantic but not too intimate. Accompanied by his sweetheart’s younger sister, he went to Saks and bought a pair of white gloves. The younger sister purchased a pair of panties for herself. During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items, and the sister got the gloves and…
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Tips For Yankees 1.) Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it. 2.) If you forget a Southerner’s name, refer to him (or her) as Bubba. You have a 50% of being right. 3.) Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean we can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows. 4.) If you do run your car in a ditch, don’t panic. Four men…
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My classmate and I come from 2 rival secondary schools. Ever since he knew from what high school I came from, he didn’t stop pestering me about how his school was better than mine. One day, at the Boy’s C.R. with other classmates, I saw him piss and he did not wash his hands. I said, “When I was in high school, we always washed our hands after taking a leak”. Caught red-handed and without any good reason, he said,…
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An African man is in the desert dying of thirst when he happens to come across a bottle. He opens it and out pops a genie. The grateful genie tells him that he will grant the man three wishes. The man immediately replies, “For my first wish, I want water. For my second wish, I want to be white. For my last wish, since I have not seen a woman for quite some time, I wish to see buttocks every…
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RESTROOM SIGNS Friends don’t let friends take home ugly men —Women’s restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE Remember, it’s not, “How high are you?” it’s “Hi, how are you?” —Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. —Men’s Room, Linda’s Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina To do is to be – Descartes To be is to do – Voltaire Do be…
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Two Alabama State troopers were chasing a Camaro going east on I-20 toward Georgia. When the suspect cross the Georgia line, the first trooper pulled over quickly and stopped. The rookie trooper pulled in behind him and said, “Hey, Sarge, why did you stop? You almost had him.” The Sarge replied, “Stupid, Rookie, he’s in Georgia now. They’re an hour ahead of us, so we’ll never catch him now.”
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