Something orange Jokes - page 2

Lifesavers

A man was doing a study of children’s senses in a first grade class using a bowl of lifesavers. He had the children put on a blindfold and identify the flavors. They began..cherry, red in color, lime, green in color, orange, orange in color. Then the man put in some honey flavored lifesavers and asked the children to identify that flavor. The kids couldn’t guess what the flavor was so the man said he would give them a hint. He…

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Read JokeLifesavers

Ever Wonder Why?

Does the reverse side also have a reverse side? Why is the alphabet in that order? What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way. Why is a carrot more orange than an orange? Do fish get cramps after eating? How come abbreviated is such a long word? Why are there 5 syllables in the word “monosyllabic”? Why is there only one Monopolies commission? Why do scientists call it “re”search when looking for something new?

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Read JokeEver Wonder Why?

Points to Ponder

Some very important questions to ask yourselves. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented? If people from Poland are called “Poles”, why aren’t people from Holland called “Holes”? If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would you get a Phillip’s Screwdriver? Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? If a pig…

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Read JokePoints to Ponder

Thoughts to ponder

Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn’t live there. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? (Jared: what do you think?) Whatever happened to preparations A through G? If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from? I went…

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Read JokeThoughts to ponder

What he says, What he really means

“Haven’t I seen you before?” “Nice ass.” “I’m a Romantic.” “I’m poor.” “I need you” “My hand is tired.” “I am different from all the other guys” “I am not circumcised.” “I really want to get to know you better.” “So I can tell my friends about it.” “It’s just orange juice, try it.” “3 more shots, and she’ll have her legs around my head.” “She’s kinda cute.” “I want to have sex with her till I am blue.” “I…

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Read JokeWhat he says, What he really means

When Men Say…It Means

Haven’t we met before? = Nice ass. I like moonlight walks on the beach. = I’m broke. I need you. = I’m getting too old to be chokin’ the chicken. It’s just orange juice…try it. = One of these, she’ll have her legs around my head. She’s a stuck-up bitch. = She won’t sleep with me. Sorry I don’t have time to make you breakfast? = Who the fuck are you? I have something to tell you. = Get tested.…

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Read JokeWhen Men Say…It Means

Dear God,

Dear God, Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? Norma Dear God, Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones,why don’t you just keep the ones you have now? Jane Dear God, Who draws the lines around the countries? Nan Dear God, I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay? Neil Dear God, Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed…

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Read JokeDear God,