blondie blondie
Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and a microwave? A: A microwave doesn’t scream when you put meat in it.
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Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Scream Jokes - page 18
Johnny’s Tantrum
As the crowded airliner is about to take off, the peace is shattered by Little Johnny, who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, Little Johnny continues to scream furiously and kick the seats around him. Suddenly, from the rear of the plane, an elderly man in the uniform of an Air Force General is seen slowly walking forward up the aisle. Stopping the…
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The First night…
This guy and his newlywed wife go off to a fancy hotel to celebrate their first night of marriage. Both of them had been saving themselves for this night and both were very anxious to, you could say, get everything underway. They strip down naked and are about to start getting kinky when the husband takes a look at his wife and says, “That’s quite a fair sized butt you got there!!” His wife starts screaming at him and going…
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Even More ‘Gasms
Newlyweds get: “soregasms” Nymphos have: “let’s-do-it-some-moregasms” Teenagers usually experience: “four-on-the-floorgasms” Salesmen have: “door-to-doorgasms” Virgins scream out: “my-hymen-got-torgasms” I know of no one who has: “I-abhorgasms” Goalies have: “scoregasms” One gal was married to a man who had: “snoregasms” (well, that was *his* excuse) Golfers have: “foregasms” Hockey players have: “Bobby Orrgasms” Miners have: “ore-gasms” Mushrooms are limited to: “sporegasms” Grocers have: “storegasms” Marco Polo had: “exploregasms” Premature ejaculators have: “beforegasms” And lastly, Selfish men have: “I-got-mine-you-get-yourgasms”
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Doctor’s Surprise
A woman went to the doctor’s office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she explained. He had her sit down and relax in another room. The older doctor marched back to the first and demanded, “What’s the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old…
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Newspaper Clip
(This is a true story from the newspaper The Cape Times, South Africa) “For several months, our nurses have been baffled to find a patient dead in the same bed every Friday morning,” a spokeswoman for the Pelonomi Hospital (Free State, South Africa) told reporters. “There was no apparent cause for any of the deaths, and extensive checks on the air condidtioning system, and search for possible bacterial infection, failed to reveal any clues. However, further inquiries have now revealed…
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Blonde On a Boeing 747
Coming on board the Boeing 747 for the first time in her life, the young blonde can hardly contain her excitement and nervousness at riding a jumbo jet for the very first time. In fact, she is so giddy with excitement that she can barely contain herself. To release tension caused by her nervousness, she starts running up and down the aisle from seat to seat, happily chanting in a very loud voice, “BOEING! BOEING! BOEING! BOEING!” Hearing the ruckus…
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Bad Dog!
Jim loved his new dog until it started bringing home things from all over the neighborhood — things like shoes and hats and kids’ toys — nothing that was that big of a deal. Except for one day the dog brought home a dead rabbit. Jim was shocked later when he found out that the rabbit actually belonged to his neighbor, Sandy, who was at work. Jim took the dead rabbit, washed it and fluffed up its fur and then…
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Top 20 things to do at Taco Bell
1. Order 25 tacos at the drive-thru, then just pull off. 2. Demand to speak with that talking Chihuahua. 3. Ask for ketchup with your nachos. 4. Ask if they accept Mexican money. 5. Tell them you want a taco, but tell them without the shell. 6. Scream “VIVA GORDITAS!” the whole time you are in there. 7. Order nachos; without cheese. 8. Ask if you can super size your taco. 9. Claim that you are the voice-over guy for…
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Nude Girl and the Fire Fighting Squad
A guy sat on his toilet one day so hard, that he broke the seat in half. So he pulled out the super glue, and left it to dry. Five minutes later, his girlfriend walked in, and took a seat. When she tried to sit up, of course, she got stuck, so in a panic, the guy called 911. “The fire fighters are on their way!” he screamed to her. “Well they can’t just see me like THIS!” she cried.…
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