Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Four men are in a training class. The professor asks the first man what is the fastest thing you know. He replied, “Thoughts. They go to your brain before you know it.” The professor said, “That’s a good one,” he turned to the next man and asked him what was the fasted thing he knew. The 2nd man replied “Blinking your eye.” The professor said, “That’s a real good one too.” He turned to the 3rd man and asked him…
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1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. 2. Memorize your favorite poem. 3. Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have, or sleep all you want. 4. When you say, “I love you,” mean it. 5. When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye. 6. Be engaged at least six months before you get married. 7. Believe in love at first sight. 8. Never laugh at anyone’s dreams. 9. Love deeply and…
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Two beggars are sitting on a park bench in Mexico City. One is holding a cross and one a Star of David. Both are holding hats to collect contributions. People walk by, lift their noses at the man with the Star of David and drop money in the hat held by the man with the cross. Soon, the hat of the man with the cross is filled and the hat of the man with the Star of David is empty.…
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Once upon a time, in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. As a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down, also knocking the snake about quite a bit. “Oh, my,” said the bunny. “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. You see, I’ve been…
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A man traveling by plane and in urgent need to use the mens room is nervously tapping his foot on the floor of the aircraft. Each time he tried the mensroom door, it was “OCCUPIED”. The stewardess, aware of his predicament suggested that he go ahead and use the ladies room, but cautioned him against using any of the buttons inside. The buttons were marked “WW, WA, PP and ATR”. Making the mistake that so many men make in disregarding…
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Debra, a beautiful Jewish girl was raised in a Strictly Orthodox home. She became engaged to Richard, a Gentile boy who agreed to convert to Judaism and to be married in the temple of Debbie’s parents. Richard had so many questions about the forthcoming ceremony that Debbie arranged for him to meet Rabbi Schiller who would be performing the marriage. “I’d like Mom and Dad to be seated right down front with all my sisters,” said Richard. “Oh no”, said…
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A minister in Florida lamented that it was difficult to get his message across to his local congregation: “It’s so beautiful here in the winter,” he said, “that heaven doesn’t interest them that much.” “And it’s so hot here in the summer that hell doesn’t really scare them either.”
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Alabama: At Least We’re Not Mississippi Alaska: But It’s a Dry Cold Arizona: But It’s a Dry Heat Arkansas: Litterasy Ain’t Everthing California: Nouvelle Cuisine and Religions You Never Heard Of Colorado: If You Don’t Ski, Forget It Connecticut: Like Massachusetts Only Dirtier Delaware: You’ll Love the Chemicals in Our Water Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids Georgia: We Put the Fun in Fundamentalist Extremism Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha’ami Leeki Toru (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)…
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One hot day,two roadworkers are laying asphalt on a back country road when a United Nations limousine pulls up next to them,and an official-looking man gets out. He looks at both men and asks, “Parlez-vous francais?” The two men just look at him confused. He then asks, “Usted habla espanol?” Again,they just stare at him. “Sprechen Sie deutsch?”, he asks. No answer. “Parlate italiano?” Still, no reply. Disgusted,the man gets back into the limo,and it quickly drives away. One worker…
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Why do women fake orgasms? 1. Because men fake foreplay. 2. They think men really care.
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