Puzzle Jokes - page 4

A man says to his friend, “I have two questions that I will ask you. One question is extremely easy to answer, while the other one is extremely difficult to answer. If you answer the first question correctly, I will give you $500. If you answer BOTH questions correctly, you will be given $1,000. Do you understand?” The friend nods affirmatively. Continuing, the man says, “OK, which question would you like first? The very easy question, or the very difficult…

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A man walked into a bar with a duck under his arm,and the bartender said”Sorry Sir, no pets allowed.” The man replied”But this is a special duck, this is Chuck the Duck” The bartender was puzzled”why is this duck so special?” The man asked if the bartender had a match,the bartender handed the man a match. The man lit the match and placed it under Chuck’s right wing, and Chuck started singing “Jingle Bells”. The man asked for another match,…

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One night, a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then the man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. By this time, everyone had left the bar and driven off. Finally, he started his engine and…

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Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown New York City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan. So the businessman hands over the keys to a Rolls-Royce parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.…

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A grandmother was surprised by her seven-year-old helper early one morning. He had made her coffee! She drank what was probably the worst cup of coffee in her entire life. And when she got to the bottom, to her utter amazement, there were three little green, army men in her cup. Puzzled, she asked, “Honey, what are these army men doing in my coffee?” Her grandson answered, “Grandma, you know how it says on TV, ‘The best part of waking…

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A wounded Marine limps into the bar and tells the bartender, “Give me a gin & tonic, a scotch & soda, a rum & coke and a Heineken.” The bartender looks a bit puzzled but, nonetheless, serves him his order. The Marine downs all four drinks, pays his tab and leaves. This goes on for a full week when the Marine enters again and orders up the usual. The bartender finally speaks up and says, “My God, man, I’ve seen…

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