Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
ARIES You tend to be a headstrong and deliberate in your actions. Basically you don’t give a fuck about anyone. Most people hate you but you couldn’t care less. You’re the type of person who would masturbate at a wedding. TAURUS Warm and caring are your most endearing characteristics. You get on well with most people because you’re bisexual. You hardly ever wear underwear and you constantly smell of piss. GEMINI Your star sign denotes an air of duality in…
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The Pope, Billy Graham, and Oral Roberts were in a three-way plane crash over the Pacific Ocean. They all died and went to heaven together. “Oh, this is terrible,” exclaims St. Peter. “I know you guys think we summoned you here, but this is just one of those rare coincidences that happen. Since we we’re not expecting you, your quarters just aren’t ready. We can’t take you in, and we can’t send you back” Then he got an idea. He…
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Here’s a little tip from an experienced traveler. A wake-up call is the worst way to wake up. The phone rings; it’s so loud; you can’t turn it down. So leave the number of the room next to you. Then you’ll hear a muffled ring, and you hear a guy yell, “What are you calling ME for?” Then you get up and take a shower. It’s great!
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“How to Keep the Wackiness Alive in the Modern Workplace, Part I” ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you’re waiting for your document. Arrive at a meeting late, say you’re sorry, but you didn’t have time for lunch, and you’re going to be nibbling during he meeting. During the meeting, eat 5 entire raw potatoes. Insist that your e-mail address be “[email protected]” Every time someone asks you to do something, ask him/her…
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Three blondes stranded on an island decide to go and have a contest to see who can swim the farthest. Well the first can only go 5 miles she got tired and slowly sank down, no more of her. The second blonde goes and got 18 miles and a shark came along and snagged her and took her under. The third blonde had sense and didn’t go. So then she goes to her purse and pulls out a cell phone…
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Q: How do crazy people go through the forest? A: They take the psycho path. Q: How do you get holy water? A: You boil the hell out of it. Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? A: Polaroids. Q: What do prisoners use to call each other? A: Cell phones. Q: What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand? A: Cuatro sinko. Q: What do you get from a pampered cow? A: Spoiled milk.…
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As you are all aware, the airline industry in which we work has it’s own unique set of terminology. The following are some of the most commonly used terms and their definitions. PASSENGER – A herding creature of widely varying intellect, usually found in pairs or small groups. Often will become vicious and violent in simple and easily rectified situations. When frightened or confused these creatures collect into a group called a “line.” This “line” has no set pattern and…
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Every morning for years, at about 11:30, the telephone operator in a small Sierra-Nevada town, received a call from a man asking the exact time. One day the operator summed up nerve enough to ask him why this regularity. “I’m foreman of the local sawmill,” he explained. “Every day I have to blow the whistle at noon, so I call you to get the exact time.” The operator giggled, “That’s really funny,” she said. “All this time we’ve been setting…
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The Nice Guy 1. How do you typically look when you arrive to pick up your date? A. I wear my church clothes B. I like to dress up. Sometimes I bring a small present or flowers C. I dress casually unless I am very impressed with the woman D. I’m late, dress as I want, and if I bring anything it’s a sixpack of beer E. I take a knife 2.”Women are special.” Is this statement true? A. Yes,…
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YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…
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