Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in the hospital. “How are you, Grandpa?” he asks. “Feeling fine,” says the old man. “What’s the food like?” “Terrific, wonderful menus.” “And the nursing?” “Just couldn’t be better. These young nurses really take good care of me.” “What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?” “No problem at all, nine hours solid every night. At 10 o’clock, they bring me a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet . . .…
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1. The last fight we had was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?” I said, “Dust!” 2. In the beginning God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then neither God nor man has rested. 3. My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state troopers and a dog. 4. Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mother-in-laws. 5. Young son: Is it…
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10.Do not say what you mean. Ever. 9. Stash feminine products in their backpacks and in their books as cute reminders that you were thinking of them. 8. Play Alanis Morissette’s “You Outta Know,” loud. Look at them. Smile. 7. Look them in the eye and start laughing. (During an intimate moment) 6. Cry. 5. Gather many female friends and dance to “I Will Survive” while they are present. Sing all the words. Sing to them. Sing loud. 4. Go…
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A blonde was sitting at a bar getting drunk. Another blonde who was also quite drunk stumbled up to her and said, “You look familiar. Are you from around here?” “Why yes,” said the first blonde, “I grew up here.” “I did too,” said the first blonde, “let’s have a drink to the best town in the world!” Down they pour a drink. So, the first blonde says, “I guess that means you went to Johnson High School here? I…
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Three nuns died and went to heaven. St. Peter upon seeing them says “You three have been so good that I will allow you to go back as anyone you want.” The first nun says, “I want to go back as Madonna, that woman has fucked everyone,” The second nun says, “I want to go back as Linda Lovelace, now there’s a whore!” The third says, “I want to go back as Alice Kinpipaline!” St. Peter says, “Sorry sister, there…
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December 14th Dearest John: I went to the door today and UPS was here with a partridge in a pear tree. What a delightful gift. I couldn’t have been more surprised. With dearest love and affection, Agnes December 15th Dearest John: Today, UPS brought your very sweet gift. Just imagine, two turtle doves? I’m just delighted at your very thoughtful gift. They are just adorable. All my love, Agnes December 16th Dear John: Oh, aren’t you the extravagant one! Now…
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How do Chinese people get their names? By throwing pots and pans down the stairs! Ching Ping Wang Dong.
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John and Dan were ridin their horses across a north americian plane and they were sort on cash so they pulled into a Ranch and went up to the owner and asked if they could do some work for some cash. The farmer said no i dont but i will give you $500 for every Indian you kill but you have to bring thier heads back with you. So anyway they set off across the plane when they came across…
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Saddam Hussein called President Clinton and said: “Bill, I called you because I had this dream last night. I could see all of America and it was beautiful, and on top of every building there was a beautiful banner.” Clinton asked, “What was on the banner?” Saddam responded, “It said Alla is God, God is Alla.” Clinton said: “You know Saddam, I’m really glad you called, because last night I had a dream too. I could see all of Baghdad…
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1. Men are like department stores…. their clothes should always be half off. 2. Men are like vacations…. they never seem to be long enough. 3. Men are like computers… hard to figure out and never have enough memory. 4. Men are like coolers… load them with beer and you can take them anywhere. 5. Men are like chocolate bars…. sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. 6. Men are like coffee…. the best ones are rich,…
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