Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A little boy was dressed up for Halloween as a pirate. When he knocked on the door, a man came holding candy. The little boy said with a lisp, “I’m a piwate, can you tell, can you tell?” The man said, “Yes, but where are your buccaneers?” The boy replied, “They’re on my buckin’ head, open your buckin’ eyes!”
(4)
Loading...
Have you ever noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? As if bills aren’t distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels . . . I write, “Could you throw this away for me? Thank you.” — Andy Rooney
(0)Loading...
A woman came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman. With superhuman strength born of fury, she dragged him down the stairs to the garage and put his tally-whacker in a vise. She secured it tightly, then removed the handle from the vise. Next, she approached him with a hacksaw. The husband, terrified, screamed, “STOP! STOP! You’re not going to… to… cut it off, are you?!!” The wife, with a gleam of revenge in…
(0)Loading...
Editor-looks like this one hasn’t reached you yet ___________________________ Clintons Operation Vowel Drop CLINTON DEPLOYS VOWELS TO SERBIA and BOSNIA Cities of Sjlbvdnzv, Grzny to Be First Recipients Before an emergency joint session of Congress yesterday, President Clinton announced US plans to deploy over 75,000 vowels to the war-torn region of Yugoslavia. The deployment, the largest of its kind in American history, will provide the region with the critically needed letters A,E,I,O and U, and is hoped to render countless…
(0)Loading...
A priest went into a Washington, D.C. barbershop and got his hair cut. He then asked asked how much he owed the barber. “No charge, Father,” the barber said. “I consider it a service to the Lord.” when the barber arrived at his shop the next morning, he found a dozen small prayer booklets on the stoop along with a thank you note from the priest. A few days later, a police officer came in. “How much do I owe…
(0)Loading...
A football coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said, “I’m not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we really need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play.” The player agreed, so the coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, “Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer…
(1)Loading...
10. Child can now open your blouse by himself. 9. The kid starts burping up silicone. 8. Child has developed a bad habit of flicking his tongue. 7. The little one keeps slipping dollar bills in your belt. 6. Child demands that you express for his cafe latte. 5. Your birth control pills interfere with his acne medicine. 4. After each session, you both have a smoke. 3. Child invites his friends over for dinner. 2. You feel an uncontrollable…
(4)Loading...
Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat. The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat. The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook, It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook. Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude, Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube. When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my boner and momma went…
(2)Loading...
Two atoms were walking down the street the other day when they bumped into each other. “Ow, that hurts,” said the first atom. “Oh, I’m sorry,” the second atom apologized. “Are you okay?” “I think so,” replied the first atom. “But I lost a neutron!” “Are you sure?” asked the second atom. The first atom said, “I’m positive!”
(1)Loading...
Little Billy is a neighor of Ms. Jones & concerned about her dog getting out — Little Billy runs up to Ms. Jone’s door, “Ms. Jones, Ms. Jones, your dog is out!” Ms. Jones replies, “That’s o.k. Billy, I let him out. He is eating grass ’cause he has gas.” Well…the next day Billy sees Ms. Jones dog is out, Billy runs to her door, “Ms. Jones, Ms. Jones your dog is out!” “I know Billy, he has gas &…
(1)Loading...