Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
One day a man and his monkey walk into a bar. The Bartender says “Let the monkey down to play.” The man says “No, Cause I’m afraid he’ll mess something up.” The Bartender says “it’ll be alright.” So the man lets the monkey down, The monkey runs and jumps on the pool table and swallows the Q-ball. The mans says “I told you he’d mess something up.” So the man picks up the monkey and leaves the bar. The next…
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A man was suffering from a stomach ache so he told his wife, who suggested he try the tablets the Doctor had given her for a similar pain. After taking his wife’s tablets for a week, the pain disappeared, but he developed two rather tender lumps, one behind each ear. He went to his doctor showed him the lumps, and explained what had happened. The Doctor called him all the fools under the sun saying, “You bloody idiot! I was…
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A priest, a minister and a rabbi have a talk one day. The priest says, “Once I went to Jerusalem to see the Holy Land and suddenly there was a terrible storm at sea. Everybody prepared to die but I started to pray to the Lord and a wonder had happened: everywhere it was still storm but there was nothing around the ship and we got safely to the land.” “That’s quite a story,” says the minister, “Actually something like…
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An elderly parish priest became unhappy with the things he was hearing during Saturday confessions. After his sermon one Sunday morning, he said to his congregation, “I’m tired of hearing so many people tell me in confession that they have cheated. For thirty years, people have been saying to me ‘I have cheated with Anthony… I have cheated with Mary… I have cheated with Frankie.’ I am sick and tired of hearing this word. From now on, when you come…
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One day a kid asks his dad, “Dad, what is a colleague?” The dad says, a colleague is an associate, a partner, some one who does the same thing you do. Then the son replies, “So dad, is the milk man your colleague?”
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[Note: this joke is better told than read] As Veteran’s Day approached, a Minnesota pastor decided it would be a good idea to have members of his congregation speak about their wartime activities. After a little research, he discovered that one of his parishioners was a fighter pilot for Norway. He asked the man to speak to the congregation, and the old pilot reluctantly agreed. After starting slowly, the old flyer warmed to the task. “Ja, I vas a Norvegian…
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One day, two boys were walking home from school when suddenly they saw a hot girl walking down the same side of the street, but unfortunately, a buff man was walking next to her. “Wow, look at her! She’s hot!” one whispers to the other. Eventually the two boys pass the girl and guy, and one they turn around to stare. “Wow, look at that ass!” says one. “Yea, he must work out…”
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If you have to write a ‘letter of recommendation’ for a fired employee, here are a few suggested phrases: -For the chronically absent: A man like him is hard to find. It seemed her career was just taking off. -For the office drunk: I feel his real talent is wasted here. We generally found him loaded with work to do. Every hour with him was a happy hour. -For an employee with no ambition: He could not care less about…
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One day a man with no tongue approched a threesome on the first tee of a golf course. He handed a card to the men that stated, “I am dumb as I have no tongue. I would like to join your threesome, making it a foursome”. The first man looked at the card and said, “No problem”. The second man looked at the card and said, “I have no problem with that”. The third man looked at the card and…
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One day Mrs. Flanagan feels sickly and goes to the doctor for a look at. The doctor looks her over and says, “Well now, Mrs. Flanagan, I’m perplexed on your condition but if you bring a urine specimen to me in the morning, I can tell exactly what’s wrong.” Mrs. Flanagan went home and said to her husband, “The doctor wants me to bring him a urine specimen in the morning. I don’t know what a urine specimen is, what…
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