Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A SNOW DIARY DECEMBER 4 – 5:00 It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our hot buttered rum and sat by the window watching the soft flakes drift down, clinging to the trees and covering the ground. It was beautiful. DECEMBER 9 – We woke to a big beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight. I shoveled snow for the first time in years and…
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Morris comes home and finds his wife Sadie crying. She says, “I found out from Mrs. Goldberg that you’re having an affair with your secretary. Why would you do that to me? I’ve always been a good wife…I’ve cooked for you, raised your children, and I’ve always been by your side for thirty-five years. What haven’t I done to make you happy?” Morris says, “It’s true, Sadie, you’ve been the best wife a man could hope for. You make me…
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Memo To: All Employees Subject: New Policies Sick Days: We will no longer accept a doctor’s statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work. Surgery: Operations are now banned. As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything. We hired you intact. To have something removed constitutes a breach of employment. Bereavement Leave: This is no excuse…
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A Jewish guy called Jacob finds himself in dire straits. His business has gone bust and he is in serious financial difficulty. He’s so desperate that he decides to ask God for help. He goes to the synagogue and begins to pray, “God please help me, I’ve lost my business and if I don’t get some money, I’m going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto.” Lotto nite comes and someone else has won. Jacob…
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Q:What is weightless, you can see through it, and when you put it in a barrel, the barrel becomes lighter? A: A HOLE
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A man hasn’t been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward the doctor comes out with the results. “I’m afraid I have some very bad news,” the doctor says. “You’re dying, and you don’t have much time left.” “Oh, that’s terrible!” says the man. “How long have I got?” “Ten,” the doctor says sadly. “Ten?” the man asks. “Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?” “Nine…”
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Q: Why doesn’t Santa Clause and Mrs. Clause have any children? A: Because Santa only comes once a year.
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This guy in New York bought a lotto ticket everyday, and everyday he told his son, ” son, if I win the lotto, it’s going to be France, champagne and Brigitte Bardot.” The next day again he comes home shows the lotto tickets to his son and says, “son, if I win the lotto it’s going to be France, champagne and Brigitte Bardot.” Finally his son, tired of hearing the same thing, askes, ” Dad what if you dont win?”…
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There are 3 women at an interview for NASA, a blonde a brunet and a redhead. First, the brunet goes in and the man asks her, “If you could go to any planet, where would you go and why?” She answers, “Saturn so I could see the rings.” Next comes the redhead and is asked the same quetion. She replies, “Jupiter, because I love the color red!” Finally the blonde comes in and is also asked the same question. She…
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“How to Keep the Wackiness Alive in the Modern Workplace, Part I” ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you’re waiting for your document. Arrive at a meeting late, say you’re sorry, but you didn’t have time for lunch, and you’re going to be nibbling during he meeting. During the meeting, eat 5 entire raw potatoes. Insist that your e-mail address be “[email protected]” Every time someone asks you to do something, ask him/her…
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