Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There was a Japanese man who went to America for sightseeing. On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. The man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, “Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!” After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi. Again, the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, “Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!” And…
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This American general was invited to Ireland to review the Irish troops. His plane landed at the Dublin airport, and the general stepped off the plane. To his surprise, there stood the Irish troops along side the runway. All of them “Buck Naked”. The general said, “A bit unusual, but carry on”. The general stepped in front of the first soldier for inspection. A fine figure of a soldier: 6’6″ tall, 200 lbs, wide shoulders, narrow waist, hair all over…
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1. Home is where you hang your @. 2. The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. 3. A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click. 4. You can’t teach an old mouse new clicks. 5. Great groups from little icons grow. 6. Speak softly and carry a cellular phone. 7. C:\ is the root of all directories. 8. Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice. 9. Pentium wise, pen…
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A girl was a prostitute, but she didn’t want her grandma to know. One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes and made them line up. The girl’s grandma came by and saw her granddaughter. Not willing to let her know the truth, the girl told her grandmother that some people were passing out free oranges and she was linning up for some. Grandma wanted oranges too, so she went to the back of the line. A policeman…
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Your Horoscope AQUARIUS: Jan. 20 ? Feb. 18 You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same stupid mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking jerk. PISCES: Feb. 19 ? Mar. 20 You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have a minor influence on your friends and people you resent you for flaunting…
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There are several men sitting around in the locker room of a private club after exercising. Suddenly, a cell phone on one of the benches rings. One of the men picks it up, and the following conversation ensues: “Hello?” “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?” “Yes.” “Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a beautiful mink coat. It’s absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?” “What’s the price?” “Only $1,500.” “Well,…
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1. If the enemy is in range, so are you. 2. Incoming fire has the right of way. 3. Don’t look conspicuous, it draws fire. ( For this reason aircraft carriers have been called “Bomb Magnets.”) 4. There is always a way. 5. The easy way is always mined. 6. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. (Trivia devotees will recall the sudden disappearance of rank and distinctive caps on the uniforms worn by Soviet officers in…
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An old guy comes up to a man and says, “Hi Mikey.” The man replies, “I’m not Mikey!” OLD GUY : Mikey, 50 years ago you were a black man and now you’re pale white. What happen to you? THE MAN : I’m not Mikey! OLD GUY : Mikey 50 years ago you were short and fat, and now you’re tall and skinny. What happen to you? THE MAN : I’m not Mikey! Finally, the old guy says, “YOU EVEN…
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There was this 34 year old woman who had a crush on a 18 year old bag boy at a local store. So one day she finally got the nerve up to tell him her feelings about him. She went to the store and the boy brought her bags out to her car. She leaned over to him and said, “I have an itchy pussy.” Then the boy told her, “Ma’m, all foreign cars look the same to me.”
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Two old friends met one day after many years. One attended college, and now was very successful. The other had not attended college and never had much ambition. The successful one said, “How has everything been going with you?” “Well, one day I opened the Bible at random, and dropped my finger on a word and it was oil. So, I invested in oil, and boy, did the oil wells gush. Then another day I dropped my finger on another…
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