Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
One fine afternoon at the new golf course in Alabama, These two men were just finishing up the front nine when they decided to take a breather in the clubhouse. They went up to the lounge room and sat down and ordered a glass of beer. They started flipping thru the channels when they decided to watch the news. The first thing that was on was a woman about to comit suicide. The first man, which was a businessman, said,…
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Dear Customers: It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 98 SOUTHERN EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside the South. If you have one of these, you may need some help understanding the commands. The Southern edition may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads “WINDERS 98” and has a background picture of General Robert E. Lee superimposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a Dukes of Hazzard screen saver.…
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A Chinese man arranges for a hooker to come to his room for the evening. Once in the room, they undress, climb into bed, and go at it. When finished, the Chinese man jumps up, runs over to the window, takes a deep breath, dives under the bed, climbs out the other side, jumps back into bed with the hooker and commences a repeat performance. The hooker is impressed with the gusto of the second encounter. When finished, the Chinese…
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A woman awoke during the middle of the night to find her husband missing from the bed. She thought it was strange because he never got up during the middle of the night. Soon about 20 minutes went by and he still hadn’t returned. Somewhat worried she went looking for him. He wasn’t in the bathroom so she went downstairs. He wasn’t in the TV room or the kitchen getting something to eat. Becoming more worried she noticed the basement…
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A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when he arrived and sat down at the head table, he suddenly realized that he had forgotten his false teeth. Turning to the man next to him, he said, “I forgot my teeth.” The man said, “No problem.” With that, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of false teeth. “Try these,” he said. The speaker tried them. “Too loose,” he said. The…
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A car breaks down along the expressway one day, so the driver eases it over onto the shoulder of the highway. He jumps out of the car, opens the trunk, and pulls out two men in trenchcoats. The men stand behind the car, open up their coats and start exposing themselves to the oncoming traffic. One of the worst pile-ups in history occurs. When questioned by police why he put two deviates along the side of the road, the man…
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Children’s Comments An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her then four-year-old daughter. On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it. Be still my heart, thought my friend, my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps! Then the child spoke into the instrument: “Welcome to McDonald’s. May I take your order?” Children on Religion….. A mother…
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I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, “Hello?” I politely said, “This is Patrick Hanifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?” Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn’t believe that anyone could be that rude. I tracked down Robin’s correct number and called her. She had transposed the last two digits. After I hung…
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Three old men are at the doctor for memory tests. The doctor says to the first old man, “What is three times three?” “274,” was his reply. The doctor says to the second man, “It’s your turn. What is three times three?” “Tuesday,” replies the second man. The doctor says to the third man, “Okay, your turn. What’s three times three?” “Nine,” says the third man. “That’s great!” says the doctor. “How did you get that?” “Simple,” says the third…
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Hank was a not-too-smart kind of guy. Every day when he walked home from work, he would get stopped by three men who would beat him up and steal his money. Finally, Hank decided that it would serve his best interest to walk a different route and then take up some self-defense classes so this wouldn’t happen again. He joined a karate class and soon was doing very well defending himself. So, one day, on the way home from work,…
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