Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a Rabbi, if they could discuss the use of the car. His father took him to his study and said to him, “I’ll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your Torah a little and get your hair cut and we’ll talk about it.” After about a month the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss…
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A woman takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work. Her 9-year-old son comes home unexpectedly, so she puts him in the closet and shuts the door. Her husband also comes home, so she puts her lover in the closet, with the little boy. The little boy says, “It sure is dark in here.” The man says, “Yes, it is.” Boy – “I have a baseball.” Man – “That’s nice.” Boy – “Want to buy it?”…
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One day a 18 year old boy is visiting his father. He is about to move out and get his own place. So he asks his father if he has any last advice. His dad looks at him and says, “You know son, this might be the most important thing I’ve ever told you.” He says, “I want you to always remember this, it’s eighteen years of child support if you break a condom.” The boy looks at him and…
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1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they?re heading for the cafeteria. People with the newspaper in their hands look like they?re heading for the bathroom. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you work longer hours than you do.…
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Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a slightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, Captain Crunch, and many others. The graveside was piled high in flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who ?never knew how much…
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Little Johnny had become a real nuisance while his father tried to concentrate on his Saturday afternoon poker game with friends and relatives. The father tried every way possible to get Johnny to occupy himself… television, ice cream, homework, video games… but the youngster insisted on running back and forth behind the players and calling out the cards they held. The other players became so annoyed that they threatened to quit the game and all go home. At this point,…
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It was Saturday morning as Jack, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife Annie sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. “What you are doing up and dressed like that?” he asks. “I’m going hunting with you”, Annie smiles. Jack reluctantly agrees to take her along, and when they reach the hunting site,…
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A nursery school teacher says to her class, “Who can use the word ‘Definitely’ in a sentence?” First a little girl says, “The sky is definitely blue.” Teacher says, “Sorry, Amy, but the sky can be gray or orange, or……” Second a little boy says, “Trees are definitely green.” “Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown.” Little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks: “Does a fart have lumps?” The Teacher looks horrified and…
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A man was on an airplane, watching the movie, and hated it. So he walked out on it. After plunging to the sea, he swam to a deserted island. He lived there for 10 years, with no human contact, no companionship. One day, he was looking out at the lagoon, and saw someone in SCUBA gear swim out of it. The man could see is was a strikingly beautiful woman. She looked at him, licked her pouty lips, and asked,…
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A very ugly and rude women walks into Walmart with her two children. She scurrilously askes the person at the door why the store is so cold. The clerk response, “I’m sorry mam, corporate sets the temperature by computer. Are these your twins?” “No, the boy is nine and the girl is seven. Why do they look alike?” “No! I just can’t believe you got fucked more than once!”
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