Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION! It comes bundled with the software. I want to die while asleep like my Grandfather, not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car. I can’t dial NINE-ELEVEN in an emergency, because there’s no ELEVEN on my phone. Kentucky: Five Million People, Fifteen Last Names. What is a free gift? Aren’t all gifts free? Can you yell “MOVIE!” in a crowded fire station? If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy? To vacillate…
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There were these two old women, Ethel and Bertha, that lived in a nursing home. There were these two old men, Paul and Bill, that the old women liked, but the men paid them no attention. The women did everything to get their attention. They cooked them their favorite meals, they flirted with them, etc. One day Ethel said to Bertha, “I know something we can do to get their attention!” Bertha replied, “Well, what is it?” Ethel said, “Let’s…
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In a nursing home: “Remember, Abe, when we were at war (WWII), and they gave us these pills so that we wouldn’t want to chase women?” “Yeah, I remember . . . .” “It seems that they finally have started working.”
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Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loves to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor woman is one sandwich short of a picnic, the other residents tolerate her, and some actually join in… one day, Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened and a man stepped out with his arm stretched out… “Stop!” he said in…
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* Horn broken. Watch for finger. * Keep honking…I’m reloading. * Your kid may be an honors student, but you’re still an idiot. * All generalizations are false. * Cover me. I’m changing lanes. * I brake for no apparent reason. * Learn from your parents’ mistakes – use birth control. * I’m not as think as you drunk I am. * Forget about World Peace…Visualize using your turn signal. * We have enough youth, how about a fountain of…
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This poem was written by Mary C. Johnson age 93 of Southfield Nursing home, for a thanks to a doctor that saved her from a disease. The sun was shining brightly, And I could hardly wait, To raise my breakfast window, And gaze upon God’s estate. The breeze was blowing gently, And it brushed the flowers away, All the nature was enchanting, Upon this lovely day. My eyes fell upon a little bird, With a tender yellow bill, Who was…
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