Nny Jokes - page 26

Stick it out

There was this little boy named Johnny and Johnny was in Kindergarten. One day, Johnny was in the back of the class room when his teacher noticed him scratching frantically at his privates. “Johnny, what’s wrong?” his teacher asked. “It itches” Johnny said. “Well, go to the office and have the secretary call your Mommy” the teacher said. Johnny called his mom and a few minutes later the teacher noticed that Johnny was back in the class room and scratching…

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3 Foreigners in a Bar

An Irishman, an Italian, and a Polish guy are in a bar. They all are talking about how much there lives suck, and how much the bars in their respective home towns are better. Then the Irishman says, “Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Dublin, there’s a better one. At MacDougal’s, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy your third drink!” The others agree that sounds like…

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Birds and Bees

Morris asks his son, now aged 10, if he knows about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” the child said, bursting into tears. Confused, the father asked his son what was wrong. “Oh dad,” he sobbed, “at age six I got the ‘there’s no Santa’ speech. At age seven I got the ‘there’s no Easter bunny’ speech. Then at age 8 you hit me with the ‘there’s no tooth fairy’ speech! If you’re going to tell…

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It shows you’re thinking

One day a teacher was doing an activity with her students in 3rd grade to figure out if they will think or not. So she goes in the corner and says, “I am holding something orange and round.” A kid then put up his hand and said, “It’s an orange.” “No,” said the teacher, “but it shows that you were thinking.” Then the teacher said, “Now I am holding something red and round.” “It’s an apple,” said a student. “No,”…

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Men vs. Women Perspective

HER STORY: He was in an odd mood when I got to the bar, I thought it might have been because I was a bit late but he didn’t say anything much about it. The conversation was quite slow going so I thought we should go off somewhere more intimate so we could talk more privately. So we went to this restaurant and he’s STILL acting a bit funny and I’m trying to cheer him up and start to wonder…

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Pledge of Allegiance

The teacher advised the class that they start each day with the pledge of allegiance and instructed them to put their right hand over their hearts and repeat after her. As she starts the recitation, she looks around the room, “I pledge allegiance to the flag . . .” When her eyes fell on Johnny, she found he had his hand over the right cheek of his buttocks. “Johnny, I will not continue until you put your hand over your…

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spelling bee

one sunny afternoon,a teacher was trying to prepare her class for a sentence test.so the teacher called on sally-sue and told her to use stupid in a sentence.so sally-sue said billy-bob is very stupid.next was billy-bob.the teacher told him to use dictate in a sentence.so this is what he said…sally-sue say my dictate good!

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Who Wears the Pants in the Family?

This guy came home to his wife one evening after working all day and began ordering her around. To his surprise the wife interrupted him by saying that she was tired and had a rough day herself. He looked at her in funny way and began unbuttoning his pants. She just stood there in a curious manner. “Here,” he said, “put these pants on.” “These will never fit me,” she said. “I could get two people in these.” Without hesitation…

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Read JokeWho Wears the Pants in the Family?