Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Three buddies from the plant take their wives to Las Vegas for a week’s vacation. The guys take in all the strip shows while the wives play in the casinos, and they all have a wonderful time. When they get home, the guys meet in the plant cafeteria for coffee on Monday morning. Jack says “I been up all night. Brenda kept yelling ‘7 come 11’ in her sleep.” “Same here” says Bob. “Nancy was dreaming about blackjack and kept…
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There was this guy that had car trouble one night while driving in the country. So he went up to this farmer’s house and asked the farmer if he could use the phone to call a tow truck. The farmer said “Ok.” The man called then hung up the phone and said, “The tow truck won’t get here ’till tomorrow because of all this rain, so could I spend the night here?” The farmer said “Ok, as long as you…
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An 85 year old man marries a lovely 25 year old woman. Because her new husband is so old the woman decides that on their wedding night they should have separate suites. She is concerned that the old fellow could overexert himself. After the festivities she prepares herself for bed and for the knock on the door she is expecting. Sure enough the knock comes and there is her groom ready for action. They unite in conjugal union and all…
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A panda is walking down the Main Street when he is approached by a “Lady of the Night”. She says, “Hello darling, would you like a nice time?” The Panda says, “Um, yes why not?” So they both go back to the lady’s apartment. She makes a fabulous dinner, with every dish imaginable, provides drinks, plays good music. The inevitable happens. They go to bed and have a really great night. In the morning the Panda gets up, has a…
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“This is to hep yu’all who don’t have the plesur of livin in the sunny South, which is sometimes covered in ice! Those who do, will wunder why these wus ever wrote down in the furst place.” Sayings in the South: “Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit. “It’s been hotter’n a goat’s butt in a pepper patch.” “Have a cup of coffee, it’s already ‘saucered and blowed.” “It’s so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs.” “My…
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You might be a redneck if: The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table…. in front of her kids. Last year you hid Easter eggs under cow pies. You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws. You think a woman who is “out of your league” bowls on a different night. Jack Daniels makes your list of “Most Admired People.” You think…
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1. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times… 2. The names contained in this report have been changed to protect the innocent… 3. The mayor then made an illegal left hand turn onto Mulraney at which point I opened fire… 4. Before I get into the details, I’ve got a few “shout-outs” for my homeys in the command staff… 5. It was so dark and wet that night you could almost eat the mist. The…
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1.At dinner, guard your plate with fork and steak knife, so as to give the impression that you’ll stab anyone, including the waiter, who reaches for it. 2.Collect the salt shakers from all of the tables in the restaurant, and balance them in a tower on your table. 3.Wipe your nose on your date’s sleeve. Twice. 4.Make funny faces at other patrons, then sneer at their reactions. 5.Repeat every third third word you say say. 6.Give your claim to fame…
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Tom’s best friend wakes him up on sunday morning after a long night of partying and drags him to church. Despite Tom’s pleas for sleep his friend forces him to sit through the entire sermon. As the priest begins his sermon Tom drifts asleep. The priest asks the church, “Why are we gathered here this morning?” At that very moment Tom’s friend, noticing Tom is asleep, jabs a pencil into Tom’s leg. Tom jumps up and screams “FOR THE LOVE…
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Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat. The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat. The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook, It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook. Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude, Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube. When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my boner and momma went…
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