Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, “I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample.” The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells: “What? What did he say? What’s he want?” His wife yells back, “Just hand him your underwear!”
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There once was an old farmer who was hauling a load of manure in his truck. Unfortunately, his truck broke down just outside the fence of a mental institution. As the farmer was trying to repair his truck a patient from the mental institution came to the fence and asked the farmer, “Hey, buddy what are you going to do with that manure?” The farmer replied, “I’m going to put it on my strawberries.” The mental patient scratched his head…
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A man is walking down the beach and sees a old bottle in the sand and begins to play kick-the-bottle to amuse himself. After a while he picks it up, and a pissed off genie merges. She says, “Normally I grant 3 wishes, but in your case, you SOB, I am going to grant only 1.” He thinks a minute and says “OK, I want to wake up with 3 women in my bed.” She says “So be it!” and…
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One of the fringe benefits of being an English or History teacher is receiving the occasional jewel of a student blooper in an essay. I have pasted together the following “history” of the world from certifiably genuine student bloopers collected by teachers throughout the United States, from eighth grade through college level. Read carefully, and you will learn a lot. The inhabitants of Egypt were called mummies. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot. The climate of…
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A woman walked up to the manager of a department store. “Are you hiring any help?” she asked. “No,” he said. “We already have all the staff we need.” “Then would you mind getting someone to wait on me?” she asked.
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A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing a single earring. This man knows his co-worker is normally a pretty conservative fellow, and he is curious about his sudden change in “fashion sense.” The man walks up to him and says, “I didn’t know you were into earrings now.” “Don’t make such a big deal of it. It’s only an earring!” he replies sheepishly. “So? How long have you been wearing one?” “Ever…
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DID YOU EVER HEAR THE EXPRESSION: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING? THIS IS HOW IT ORIGINATED: George Washington was traveling with his troops at Valley Forge. They were cold, hungry and tired. One of the soldiers asks General Washington when they can stop to get some food and rest. Washington tells them he’ll stop at the next house he sees. At the house, he knocks on the door and asks the lady if she can give his men food and…
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At a conference on the supernatural, one of the speakers asked, “Who here has seen a ghost?” Most hands went up. “And how many of you have had some form of interaction with a ghost?” About half the hands remained up. “Okay, now how many of you have had physical contact with a ghost?” Three hands stayed up, and there was a slight murmur in the crowd. “Well, that’s very interesting. Let me ask if any of you have, how…
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A man sitting at the window one evening casually calls to his wife, “There’s that woman that our next door neighbor is fooling around with!” His wife dropped the plate she was drying, ran into the living room, knocked over a vase and broke it on her way to the window. “WHERE? WHERE? she demanded. “Right over there on the corner. The lady in the blue dress.” “YOU IDIOT! THAT’S HIS WIFE!!!” “Yes, I know,” the husband said, with a…
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You know why Gerald R. Ford became ill, shortly after leaving the Republican convention? Being around THAT many Republicans at one time, is enough to make ANYONE sick! And there is ONE “positive note” for George W. Bush in picking Mr. Cheney to be his running mate: For the first time ever in his life, George W. will have a DICK….
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