Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A drunk man was casually taking a leak into a drinking fountain in the park. A police officer came up to him and yelled, franctially, “WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING? THERE IS A PUBLIC TOILET 20 FEET FROM HERE!” The drunk, amazed, yells back, “WHAT DO YOU THINK I HAVE HERE, A HOSE?!”
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One time, when the Chicago Cubs were digging deep in the barrel for new talent, a scout excitedly phoned manager Charlie Grimm from somewhere in the sticks. “Charlie,” he shouted, “I’ve landed the greatest young pitcher in the land. He struck out every man who came to bat—twenty-seven in a row! Nobody even got a foul until two were out in the ninth. The pitcher is right here with me. What shall I do?” Back came Grimm’s voice. “Sign up…
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A worker on a construction site of a high rise building climbed all the way to the top of the building before realizing that he needed a second pair of hands to accomplish the task he had in mind. Not wanting to climb all the way back down, and also realizing that no one would hear him if he yelled, he signaled to the foreman on the ground. He pointed first to himself, then his knee, and then the foreman,…
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There was this young boy who really liked going fast. So his parents bought him a tricycle. One day his brother came over with his brand new car. The young boy ran up to his brother and begged him to give him a ride in his new, fast car. The brother said “How about this. I’ll tie your tricyle to the back of my car and I’ll pull down the street.” The young boy accepted immediately. The arrangement was that…
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A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. “Tim, you be first,” she said. “What does your mother do all day?” Tim stood up and proudly said, “She’s a doctor.” “That’s wonderful. How about you, Amie?” Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, “My father is a mailman.” “Thank you, Amie,” said the teacher. “What about your father, Billy?” Billy proudly stood up & announced, “My daddy plays piano in a whorehouse.”…
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There was a man that was going to rob his first bank in his life but he was nervous about doing it. So the next day he went downtown and walked into the bank and said, “Freeze, mother sticker, this is a fuck up!”
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Things you shouldn’t say to a cop Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. And that hooker I met at the AIDS clinic said you were a nice guy. Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125mph to keep up with me! Good job! That uniform makes your ass look really big. Excuse me. Is “stick up” hyphenated? I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a Police Officer. You don’t happen…
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This fellow is looking to buy a saw to cut down some trees in his back yard. He goes to a chainsaw shop and asks about various models. The dealer tells him, “Look, I have lots of models, but why don’t you save yourself a lot of time and aggravation and get the top-of-the-line model. You can’t go wrong with this chainsaw, and it will cut a hundred cords of wood for you in one day. So, the man takes…
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A man makes a suggestion to his wife. “Honey, what do you say that tonight we change positions?” His wife responds with, “Yes, I would really like that! Tonight, you stand by the ironing board, and I’ll lie on the couch and watch TV.”
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Once upon a time, a beautiful princess was seated on the shore of a pond near her castle. As she combed her golden tresses in the reflection of the pristine water, a frog hopped into her lap and spoke to her. “Dearest Princess, I was once a handsome prince with a thousand servants and riches beyond your imagination. One day a beggar woman transformed me into this frog that you see before you, for she was indeed a witch. But…
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