Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Just recently I was sitting down to dinner with my family one night and we were talking about nuclear warfare (for some reason). So Dad told us about the man who stands behind the President and is handcuffed to a suitcase. Dad asked me, “So what do you think is in that suitcase that could be so important?” I said, “Condoms?!”
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This guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to take a sip and when he does this little 12 inch man runs down his arm and kicks over his drink. The man orders another and the same thing happens. So after a couple more times the bartender asks what’s with the little guy? The man replies i wished for a 12 inch prick and this is what i got!
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A woman is in her doctor’s office getting undressed for an examination. She turns to a naked blond lady sitting beside her and says, “I told the doctor I have a cold, and he told me to strip. Does that seem suspicious to you?” The naked blonde says, “Don’t ask me. I’m only here to fix the fax machine.”
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A man was on an airplane, watching the movie, and hated it. So he walked out on it. After plunging to the sea, he swam to a deserted island. He lived there for 10 years, with no human contact, no companionship. One day, he was looking out at the lagoon, and saw someone in SCUBA gear swim out of it. The man could see is was a strikingly beautiful woman. She looked at him, licked her pouty lips, and asked,…
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Once there was a man who bought a guitar. He went down the street and played it for a dog, and the dog died. He walked further down the street and stopped to play for a cat, and the cat fell over and died. So the man hung up his guitar afraid that if he played it for himself he would die. About a week later he sees an ad in the paper that reads, ‘angry bull, reward for the…
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What’s a man’s idea of foreplay? He asks, “Got change for a $100?”
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An old farmer was hauling a load of manure when he was stopped by a state trooper. “You were speeding,” the cop said. “I’m going to have to give you a ticket.” “Yep,” the farmer said as he watched the trooper shoo away several flies. “These flies sure are terrible,” the trooper complained. “Yep,” the farmer said. “Them are circle flies.” “What’s a ‘circle fly’?” “Them’s flies that circle a horse’s tail,” answered the farmer. “Them are ‘circle flies’.” “You…
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A woman carrying a baby got on a bus and after paying the fare, took a seat behind the bus driver. Later on, a drunken man got on the same bus and after paying his fare, took a seat beside the woman carrying a baby. Since they were the only passengers on the bus, the drunk tried to strike up a conversation with the woman who tried her best to ignore him. Then the drunk took one look at the…
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A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night, the woman leans over and says, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket.” The man leans out and,…
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Once a long time ago, there was a season when neither the Packers nor the Vikings made the post-season playoffs. It seemed so unusual that the management of both teams got together and decided that there should be some sort of competition between the two teams, because of their great on-going rivalry. So they decided on a week-long fishing competition. The team that catches the most fish at the end of the week wins. On a cold, northern Wisconsin lake,…
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