Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
An Irishman, an Italian, and a Polish guy are in a bar. They all are talking about how much there lives suck, and how much the bars in their respective home towns are better. Then the Irishman says, “Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Dublin, there’s a better one. At MacDougal’s, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy your third drink!” The others agree that sounds like…
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A man went to the store and bought a few eggs for his breakfast but when he got home, he found all the shells empty. He went to the shopkeeper to ask for an explanation. The shopkeeper checked all the eggs in the shop and surprisingly they were all empty too. Perplexed, both of them went to the poultry farm to check where this problem was actually taking place. They found a hen that had just laid an egg, but…
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Every newspaper in New York sent a reporter and a staff photographer to the office of a local ophthalmologist when it was learned that he recently performed a successful sight-saving operation on the wife of the country’s most celebrated pop artist. In addition to paying the doctor’s usual fee, he had gratefully insisted on painting one of his contemporary masterpieces across an entire wall of the doctor’s waiting room. The mural turned out to be an immense multi-colored picture of…
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Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company (responsible for the accident) to court. In court the trucking company’s fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe. “Didn’t you say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine,’?” said the lawyer. Farmer Joe responded, “Well I’ll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the…….” “I didn’t ask for any details,” the lawyer interrupted, “just answer the question.” “Did…
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Judi stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, “I have a complaint!” “Yes, Ma’am?” “I borrowed a book last week, and it was horrible!” “What was wrong with it?” “It had way too many characters, and there was no plot whatsoever!” The librarian nodded and said, “Ahhh. So YOU must be the person who took our phone book!”
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No, really, I’m O.K. to drive… – I’m wasted, and I am too embarrassed to have anybody see who I’m going with I’m not used to these darts… – I’m not used to throwing anything smaller than a pool cue when I’m this bombed. Let’s go out to my car and get some cigarettes…(male to female) – You would look great face down in my lap. Want to check out my new car stereo? (male to female) – I have…
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A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive. She lives for ten more years, and then dies. A ceremony is again held at the same place, and at the end of the ceremony…
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A man was driving along the highway in Wyoming, when he noticed a beautiful white stallion standing proudly on a hill. All of his life the man dreamt of owning a horse like that, when suddenly he spotted the entrance to a ranch. The owner was outside mending a fence, so the man asked him, “Is that your horse?” “Yes it is,” replied the rancher, “in fact I was thinking about selling him.” Well the potential buyer got so excited…
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A true story from Associated Press, by Kurt Westervelt. At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, the president, Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story: On March 23, 1994, the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. The decedent had jumped from the top of a ten story building intending to commit…
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A big-city, California, lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, “I shot a duck and it fell into this field and now I’m going to retrieve it.” The old farmer replied, “This is my property,…
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