Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man walks onto an airplane and takes his seat. He looks up and notices the most beautiful women he has ever seen boarding the plane. He is so nervous, and he soon realizes that she is walking down the aisle toward him. When she takes the seat next to him, he is anxious to begin a conversation with her. He asks, “Where are you flying to today?” She responds, “To the annual nymphomaniac convention in Chicago.” He is CRAZED…
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What does a sperm have in common with a lawyer? They both have a 1 in a million chance of becoming a human! Why should lawyers be buried 100 feet deep? Because deep down, they`re really good people. Why don`t lawyers go to the beach? Cats keep trying to bury them in the sand. If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why shouldn`t you swerve and hit him? It might be your bicycle. Why did the lawyer cross the…
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A man had six children and was very proud of his achievement. He was so proud of himself that he started calling his wife, ‘Mother of Six,’ in spite of her objections.’ One night they went to a party. The man decided that it was time to go home, and wanted to find out if his wife was ready to leave as well.’ He shouted at the top of his voice, “Shall we go home, Mother of Six?” His wife,…
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Once a woman went to the fruit store with her baby son, who everybody thought he was so ugly and never said a nice word as courtesy. But she noticed the store guy playing with her son, so she was so happy and thanked the nice man and said, “You are so nice to play with him, everyone avoids him..!” Guy: “Rubbish! Here, give him a banana, he’s the nicest monkey I’ve ever seen !”
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ALWAYS GIVE 100% AT WORK: 12% Monday 23% Tuesday 40% Wednesday 20% Thursday 5% Friday ***** As salesman was assigned to secure an important client but failed in his mission. He faxed his secretary and asked her to break the news indirectly to his boss. His note read, “Failed in securing client, prepare the boss.” He received the following fax from his secretary: “The boss is prepared… prepare yourself.” ***** Nobody is sicker than the man who is sick on…
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Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a slightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, Captain Crunch, and many others. The graveside was piled high in flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who ?never knew how much…
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A married couple was on holiday in Pakistan. They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop. From inside they heard a gentleman with a Pakistani accent say, “You foreigners Come in. Come into my humbleshop.” So the married couple walked in. The Pakistani man said to them, “I have some special sandals 1 think you’d be interested in. They make you wild at sex like a great desert camel.”…
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Twas the night before crisis, And behind White House doors, Not a creature was stirring, Especially Al Gore. The interns were nestled, Dressed in their berets, In hopes that Saint Bubba Would come out to play. When on the East Lawn, There arose such a clatter, Even Sam Donaldson Lost control of his bladder. Away to our TVs We flew like a flash, There’s a special report, And it’s pre-empting M*A*S*H! And what to our wondering Eyes should appear, But…
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Since going beyond the speed limit is the national sport in many countries, there is universal disdain for those uniformed creatures who stop you while you are driving. Here are a few things best left unsaid. – Hey, you must’ve been doing’ about 125 to keep up with me! Good job! – Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. – I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.…
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102 REASONS IT’S GREAT TO BE A GUY. 1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. 2. Movie nudity is virtually always female. 3. You know stuff about tanks. 4. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase. 5. Monday Nite Football. 6. You don’t have to monitor your friends sex lives. 7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter. 8. You can open all your own jars. 9. Old friends don’t give you crap if you’ve lost or gained…
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