Dog Walks Into A Bar
A dog walks into a bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A dog walks into a bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
There are these two gay guys and they really want to have a baby together, so they go out looking and finally find a woman to bear their child for them… well after the baby’s born they go to the nursery where they keep the newborns and all the babies are screaming!! …but then they see one little boy off to the side and he’s really calm. They say, “Well that must be ours, he’s just so precious!” they then…
A guy walks into a bar with an octopus under his arm. He sets the octopus on a stool next to him and announces: “This is an amazing octopus. I’ll bet anyone in this bar that this octopus can play any instrument set in front of it.” Now none of the people could believe this, so one guy brought up a guitar. The octopus took hold of the guitar and started wailing way, better than Jimi Hendrix. The man took…
A man entered very slowly into this hooker’s room. Looking at his slowness in walking and unbuttoning shirt, the hooker became impatient and said, “Come on hurry up, I have more business to do.” Now for you the rate is, $10 on the floor, $20 on the couch, and $30 on the bed. Pay the service charge first and get down to work.” The guy opened his wallet and put thirty dollar neatly on the bed. “I see, so you…
A passenger jet was suffering through a severe thunderstorm. As the passengers were being bounced around by the turbulence, a young woman turned to a minister sitting next to her and, with a nervous laugh, says, “Reverend, you’re a man of God. Can’t you do something about this storm?” The minister replies, “Lady, I’m in sales, not management.”
A young man watched as an elderly couple sat down to lunch at McDonald’s. He noticed that they had ordered just one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the old gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, etc, until each had exactly half. Then the old man poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup and set that in front of his wife. The…
Three boys save President Bush’s life. President Bush says to them, “Boys, you can have anything your little hearts desire.” The first boy asks for a Game Boy and every game ever made for it. President Bush says, “You got, little man.” The second boy asks for a Playstation 2 and a pony. President Bush says, “You’ll have ’em by tommorow.” The third boy asks for a wheelchair with a built-in Playstation and freezer. President Bush asks the boy, “Why…
Some time after their bitter divorce, a man happened to pull up alongside his ex-wife at a traffic signal. He shouted over, “So . . . out looking for a little, huh?” She smiled sweetly and said, “No, I had six years of THAT with you. Now, I’m out looking for a LOT!”
How is a man like a snowstorm? You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get, or how long he’ll stay.
A man approaches another man and says, “Hi sir, I am a genie and I”m here to grant you three wishes, but before you ask for anything I would advice you to take your time and think about your wishes carefully. However, I do have a request.” “Wow! this must be my lucky day. what is your request?” “I have been in the bottle for the last 1000 years so if you dont mind can I have sex with your…