Yo Momma so Fat
Yo Mama so fat she has her own area code. Yo Mama so fat she had to make a bra out of two parachutes. Yo Mama so fat she can be on three continents at once. Yo Mama so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phone book.
(0)
Loading...
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Mak Jokes - page 51
A memo from Bill
A memo…. Mr. John Hinkley St. Elizabeth Hospital Washington D.C. Dear John, Hillary and I wanted to drop you a short note to tell you how pleased we are with the great strides you are making in your recovery. In our Country’s new spirit of understanding and forgiveness we want you to know there is a bilateral consensus of compassion and forgiveness abroad throughout the land. Hillary and I want you to know that no grudge is born against you…
(0)Loading...
Santa’s Bitter
T’was the night before Chrismas – Old Santa was pissed He cussed out the elves and threw down his list Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks I have good mind to scap the whole works I’ve busted my ass for damn near a year Instead of “Thanks Santa” – whad do i hear The old lady bitches cause I work late at night The elves want more money – The reindeer all fight Rudoph got drunk and goosed all the…
(0)Loading...
Phone-In Polls
You know those shows where people call in and vote on different issues? Did you ever notice there’s always about 18% that say, “I don’t know.” It costs 90 cents to call up and vote…They’re voting, “I don’t know.” Example: “Honey, I feel very strongly about this. Give me the phone.” Then he makes his call and says, “I DON’T KNOW!” then hangs up, looking proud because he voiced his non-opinion. This guy probably calls up phone sex girls at…
(0)Loading...
The “REAL” creation of Earth
IN THE BEGINNING In the beginning there was the computer. And God said %Let there be light! #Enter user id. %God #Enter password. %Omniscient #Password incorrect. Try again. %Omnipotent #Password incorrect. Try again. %Technocrat #And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1. %Let there be light! #Unrecognizable command. Try again. %Create light #Done %Run heaven and earth #And God created Day and Night. And God saw there were 0 errors. #And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday,…
(0)Loading...
Considerate Bus Driver
A woman carrying a baby got on a bus and after paying the fare, took a seat behind the bus driver. Later on, a drunken man got on the same bus and after paying his fare, took a seat beside the woman carrying a baby. Since they were the only passengers on the bus, the drunk tried to strike up a conversation with the woman who tried her best to ignore him. Then the drunk took one look at the…
(0)Loading...
Golf Balls
An avid golfer goes to the local golf course to get in a couple hours of practice after work one day. He hits a large bucket of balls on the driving range, but still hasn’t corrected the slice he’s working on. Not having enough money to buy another bucket of balls and being all alone on the practice tee, he walks up the edge of the driving range picking up balls in the weeds and bushes so as not to…
(0)Loading...
Bush in Office
December 30, 2004/Washington, D.C.(Associated Press) After four years of legal wrangling, George W. Bush was finally declared the winner of the 2000 Presidential Election yesterday. Bush, a Republican, will take the oath of office at noon today and serves until January 20, 2005, a term of about three weeks. Then he gives way to the undisputed winner of the 2004 Presidential Election, New York Senator Hillary Rodham Greenspan (formerly Clinton). Facing a drastically shortened presidency, Bush attempted to strike an…
(0)Loading...
What Women want from Men 1 – 10
ONE- Foreplay is not a privilege; it is a birthright. TWO- If you take her out to a fancy restaurant, don’t try to subtly steer her away from the lobster, Diamond Jim. THREE- Quit blowing smoke up women’s asses about the sanctity and power they possess as life-givers and come up with some decent affordable child care. That way, maybe poor single mothers can go to work and get off welfare, and we won’t have to listen to any more…
(0)Loading...
The Sick Drunks
One night there were two drunks lying in a ditch, and one had his finger up the other one’s butt. A police officer was driving by and stopped when he saw them. “What are you doing with your finger up his butt?” the policeman asked. The drunk man said, “My friend is sick and I’m trying to make him puke…” The cop said, “You can’t make him puke like that!” The drunk replied, “Like hell I can’t… just wait until…
(0)Loading...