Little red car Jokes - page 14

Who is that?

My friend’s husband, an air-traffic controller, had a pilot ask if he could veer off course, on his way into land. The request wasn’t all that unusual, as many air crews want to check out the local scenery. My friend’s husband gave his permission, but became somewhat curious, when he realized that the area the aircraft was flying over, had little scenic interest. “By the way,” the air-traffic controller asked, “what is it that you are looking at?” The pilot…

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100 Blonde Jokes!

1. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! 2. Q: How do blonde braincells die? A: Alone. 3. Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? A: Pregnant. 4. Q: How do you brainwash a blonde? A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down. 5. Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. 6. Q: How does a blonde part their…

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Follow that Plow!

It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car while it warmed up and thought about her situation. She finally remembered her daddy’s advice that if she ever got caught in a blizzard, she should wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it.…

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Birds and Cones

Little Johnny was sitting in the class, Miss Jones asked him, “If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one, how many are left?” “None”, Johnny replies. The teacher, astonished, asked Johnny to explain “Well,” Little Johnny replies, “The sound of the gunshot will scare the other birds and they will fly away.” The teacher responded, “The correct answer is 4, but I appreciate your way of matured thinking, maybe you are right”. Little Johnny then…

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The Elephant Escaped!

One day, there was a woman cooking breakfast and listening to the radio. All of the sudden a voice breaks in and says, “A circus train was going through town when it wrecked and all the animals escaped. If you see one of them, please contact the police department immediately.” Well, she didn’t think anything about it and went on with her morning. A little later, she was washing the dishes and looked out the window and there was an…

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I Like Monkeys

I like monkeys. The pet store was selling them for five cents apiece. I thought this was odd since they are normally a couple thousand apiece. I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth, so I bought 200 of them. I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one of them drive. His name was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in…

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Barbie And Ken’s Letters To Santa

Barbie’s Letter To Santa: Dear Santa: Listen, you fat little troll, I’ve been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas Present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid weather, and drowning in fake tea from one too many tea parties, and I hate to break it to ya Santa, but IT’S DEFINITELY PAY BACK TIME! There had better be some changes around here this Christmas, or I’m gonna call for a nationwide meltdown (and trust me, you…

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Lil Johnny

Lil’ Johnny on Politics Lil’ Johnny goes to his dad and asks, “What is politics?” Dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you The People. The nanny- well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we’ll call him The…

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