Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Two little boys were playing in a neighbor lady’s yard when they noticed a man knock on her door and say he wanted to have a good time and asked her, how much? She told him $30.00 and let him in. A little while later he left with a big smile on his face. This happened several more times and the little boys were getting more and more curious, so they knocked on the lady’s door and said they wanted…
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There are these two gay guys and they really want to have a baby together, so they go out looking and finally find a woman to bear their child for them… well after the baby’s born they go to the nursery where they keep the newborns and all the babies are screaming!! …but then they see one little boy off to the side and he’s really calm. They say, “Well that must be ours, he’s just so precious!” they then…
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A guy walks into a bar with an octopus under his arm. He sets the octopus on a stool next to him and announces: “This is an amazing octopus. I’ll bet anyone in this bar that this octopus can play any instrument set in front of it.” Now none of the people could believe this, so one guy brought up a guitar. The octopus took hold of the guitar and started wailing way, better than Jimi Hendrix. The man took…
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A lady and a friend were playing golf at a resort. The lady hits her golfball and a little while after hears a scream. She runs towards the scream and finds a man lying on the floor, holding his crutch. The woman exclaims, “oh my, I’m so sorry, please, i am a physiotherapist, let me massage it and it will feel better.” The man replies that it is fine. The women insists and sticks her hands down his pants and…
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A little boy had a little red wagon and he had his dog tied up to it. The boy was sitting in the wagon as the dog was pulling him very slowly. A man walks by and says to the boy, “You know that if you tied that rope around the dog’s neck instead of his balls he would pull you around faster.” The boy looked at the man and replied, “Yeah, but then I wouldn’t have the cool siren.”
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1. Instead of getting a “General Protection Fault” error, your PC would get “Ferklempt”. 2. “Year 2000” issues are replaced by “Year 5760-5761” issues. 3. Hanukkah screen savers will have “Flying Dreidels”. 4. Your PC shuts down automatically at sundown on Friday evenings. 5. After your computer dies, you would dispose of it within 24 hours. 6. Your “Start” button would be replaced with a “Let’s go! I’m not getting any younger!” button. 7. “Abort, Retry, Ignore” would be replaced…
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Frank phones his wife Angie at ten to five and tells her he’s bringing his boss home for dinner. Angie is furious that she’s had no time to prepare but when Frank and his boss arrive, she has miraculously made a marvelous veal marsala, with pasta, chianti and a spinach salad. She’s even managed to shower, change into a dress, and get their little six-year-old daughter, Stephanie, looking clean and pretty. As they are seated at the dining room table,…
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The average cucumber is at least six inches long Cucumbers stay hard for a week A Cucumber won’t tell you that size doesn’t count Cucumbers don’t get too excited A Cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety Cucumbers are easy to pick up You can fondle Cucumbers in the supermarket…and you know how firm it is before you take one home Cucumbers can get away any weekend With a Cucumber you can get a single room…and you won’t have to check…
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There was a farmer who had a little boy named Albert. One evening the farmer had to go to the barn to pull a calf. After working for several hours, the calf was born. When the farmer turned, Albert was standing behind him and had witnessed the entire incident. The farmer thought to himself how tired he was and how many questions Albert would have about what he had just witnessed. He just did not feel like talkin’ about the…
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A little old lady went into the Bank of Canada one day, carrying a bag of money. She insisted that she must speak with the president of the bank to open a savings account because, “It’s a lot of money!” After much hemming and hawing, the bank staff finally ushered her into the president’s office (the customer is always right!). The bank president then asked her how much she would like to deposit. She replied, “$165,000!” and dumped the cash…
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