Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There was a family who NEVER cussed or used bad words. One day the mother went to the butcher shop to get something for dinner. The butcher recognized her and greeted her. “Hi Mrs. Jones, have I got something for you! This new imported ham arrived yesterday and boy is this Dam ham delicious!” Mrs. Jones gasped and replied, “Mr. Smith, why I’m shocked at your language!” “No, you don’t understand,” the butcher replied, THAT’S the name of this ham,…
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Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. Now, he was being interviewed by a very nervous man who ran a small business that he had started himself. “I need someone with an accounting degree,” the man said. “But mainly, I’m looking for someone to do my worrying for me.” “Excuse me?” the accountant said. “I worry about a lot of things,” the man said. “But I don’t want to have to worry…
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A hack golfer spends a day at a plush country club, playing golf & enjoying the luxury of a complimentary caddy. Being a hack golfer, he plays poorly all day. Round about the 18th hole, he spots a lake off to the left of the fairway. He looks at the caddy and says, “I’ve played so poorly all day, I think I’m going to go drown myself in that lake.” The caddy looks back at him and says, “I don’t…
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When I came into the office this morning, I noticed a sort of general feeling of unfriendliness, and since several of you have called me a “dirty son of a bitch” to my face, I knew I must have done something wrong at the office New Year’s Party. The Office Manager called me from the hospital today, and as this is my last day on the job, I’d like to take this way of apologizing to all of you. I…
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It’s common practice in England to ring a telephone by sending extra voltage across one side of the two wire circuit and ground (earth in England). When the subscriber answers the phone, it switches to the two wire circuit for the conversation. This method allows two parties on the same line to be signaled without disturbing each other. Anyway, an elderly lady with several pets called to say that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called; and that…
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Three women were all applying for a position in the accounting department. The interviewer asked each of them this question: “If you were to find $100,000, what would you do with it?” The first woman said that she would give it all back. The second woman said that she would give half back and keep half for herself. The third woman said that she would keep all the money. Which woman got the job? The one one with the biggest…
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“I think we agree, the past is over.”?On his meeting with John McCain, Dallas Morning News, May 10, 2000 “It’s clearly a budget. It’s got a lot of numbers in it.”–Reuters, May 5, 2000 (Thanks to Allison Fansler.) GOV. BUSH: Because the picture on the newspaper. It just seems so un-American to me, the picture of the guy storming the house with a scared little boy there. I talked to my little brother, Jeb?I haven’t told this to many people.…
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your mama is so ugly I just forgot the joke.
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Once upon a time, there was a beautiful valley, where the grass grew green and the people were happy. A river flowed through the center of this valley, providing life and water to all who needed it. Also in this valley lived the Twids. The Twids were friendly people, but they were very small. In fact, Twids were about the height of an average person’s knees. Anyway, these twids lived happily and in harmony with the world around them. On…
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An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, “I like both.” “Both?” said the artist. Engineer: “Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress,they will each assume…
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