Irs Jokes - page 3

First Day of School

It was the first day of school and after lunch, the teacher, Miss Adams, was passing out candy treats wrapped in foil. She was then asking each child to identify what they had been given. When she came around to little Eddie, he could not name the Hershey ‘kiss’ he had received. “All right, Eddie”, said Miss Adams. “Here’s a hint. It’s something your daddy wants from your mommy when he gets home from work. Take a bite and tell…

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First On The Scene

As the result of some horseplay with a teammate, football Hall of Famer Bronko Nagurski once fell out of a second-floor window. A crowd gathered. A policeman appeared. He asked, “What happened? Replied Nagurski, “I don’t know. I just got here myself.”

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First Sexual Experience

Jim, who is 17, normally goes out and is home by 11:00 but one night 11:00 passes and Jimmy is not home yet. His father gets really worried and waits outside the house for him. 12:00 passes, 1:00, finally at 2:00 Jimmy gets home. His father, who is furious by this time, asks him why he is late. Jimmy replies, “Dad, I had my first sexual experience today!” His dad is all excited and proud. He puts his arm around…

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IRS Forms

The main difference between the Internal Revenue Service short form and long form: When you use the short form the government gets your money. When you use the long form, your accountant gets it.

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Love at First Sight

A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, “But we don’t know anything about each other.” He said, “That’s all right, we’ll learn about each other as we go along.” So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 Meter…

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Little Johnny’s First Job

Little Johnny got his first job as a busboy in a restaurant. After a lady spills her drink, she requested little Johnny to clean up her mess. Little Johnny was too busy avoiding work so he never got to her. The lady then found Little Johnny flirting with a young lady at the corner of the restaurant. Angrily she went and said, “Listen, busboy, I thought I told you to clean my mess up.” Frustrated, Little Johnny said, “Geez, lady,…

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IRS

What does the IRS have in common with a rubber? -Both stand for inflation, halt procuctivity, cover up pricks, and most can see right through them.

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The First night…

This guy and his newlywed wife go off to a fancy hotel to celebrate their first night of marriage. Both of them had been saving themselves for this night and both were very anxious to, you could say, get everything underway. They strip down naked and are about to start getting kinky when the husband takes a look at his wife and says, “That’s quite a fair sized butt you got there!!” His wife starts screaming at him and going…

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Worst Ever First (and Last) Date

This was on The Tonight Show September 7, 1999 Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The following won. She said it was snowing and cold and the guy took her skiing. It was just a day trip. They had never been out together before. The day went OK until they were coming back that afternoon. They were driving home and she suddenly had to pee urgently, but still…

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Rabbi and the IRS

Rabbi Schwartz answers his phone. “Hello. Is this Rabbi Schwartz?” “It is.” “This is the IRS. Can you help us?” “Probably.” “Do you know a Sam Cohen?” “I do.” “Is he a member of your congregation?” “He is.” “Did he donate $10,000?” “He will.”

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