Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Three cowboys are sitting around a campfire, out on the lonesome prairie, each with the bravado for which cowboys are famous. A night of tall tales begins. The first one says, “I must be the meanest, toughest cowboy there is! Why, just the other day, a bull got loose in the corral and gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns, with my bare hands.” The second one can’t stand to be bested. “Why that’s…
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Police reports show that the first shipment of Viagra was received at a airport in Kentucky…. It was hi-jacked at a UPS terminal by a gang of thieves that wore masks. The police warn that they may be hardened criminals. Beware!
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When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the American Ambassador to France threw a gala dinner party at the Embassy in his honor. At the dinner table, the Ambassador’s wife was chatting with Madame deGaulle. “Madame,” she began, “Your husband has been such a prominent figure in the world for so long, first as a great General, then as President of the Republic, now as a statesman, what are you most looking forward to in your retirement years?”…
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These three guys were walking along the beach, chatting it up, when they hear calls for help from two young women caught in the riptide. The first guy comes running up, screaming “I’ll save you!” He jumps in the water, swims out, and comes back with one arm missing. His friends look stunned, so he explains, “Sharks.” The second guy, feeling superior, says, “I’ll go save them!” and jumps in. He comes back and he’s missing a leg. Before either…
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A young Jewish couple had only recently set up housekeeping when an unfortunate incident occurred. Early one morning, the wife, drowsy from sleep, went to the bathroom and neglected to notice that the seat had been left up. When she sat, she kept going! She was just the right size and shape so that she became jammed into the toilet past her waist with her legs sticking straight up in front of her. She cried for her husband, who rushed…
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One day a man named Olaf walks into the office of a headhunter and says, “I WON A DOB!” The headhunter looks up over the top of his glasses and says, “Excuse me?” Once again the man says, “I WON A DOB!” “Oh,” the headhunter says. “You want a job, I see…what is it you do?” The man says, “I’m a Diesel Fitter.” With this the headhunter turns on his laptop and types vigorously to search his computer files in…
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Two blondes lock their keys in their car, so one blonde trys to break in. The other blonde just stands there. Eventually the first blonde says,”I can’t break in!” and the seconed blonde replies, “Well keep trying it looks like its going to rain and the tops down.”
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A little girls begins her first day at a new school and the teacher tells her to stand up and tell everyone in the class her name. She stands up, faces the class and says loudly, “Snot Nose Smith!” “Young lady,” the teacher says impatiently. “This won’t be tolerated in my class, now say you correct name” “Snot Nose Smith!” She repeats. “Look here Miss Smith, this is your last chance. Now what is your real name?” “Snot Nose Smith!”…
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Two builders were working on the 48th floor of a skyscraper. One turns to the other and says, ” Damn, I gotta take a piss.” The other guy tells him to go ahead. The first guy says,”hell, we’re on the 48th floor. By the time I get to the ground, I’ll have pissed my pants.” The second guy looks around and spots a plank about twelve feet long, and gets an idea. He tells the first guy, “Hey, listen. I’ll…
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ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW ABOUT LIFE I LEARNED FROM NOAH’S ARK 1 Don’t miss the boat. 2 Don’t forget we are all in the same boat. 3 Plan ahead, it wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark. 4 Stay fit-when you are 600 years old, someone might just ask you to do something really big. 5 Don’t listen to critics, just get on with what has to be done. 6 For safety’s sake, travel in pairs. 7 Two…
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