Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway, when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye. It reads: SISTERS OF MERCY -HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES. He thinks it was just a figment of his imagination and drives on without a second thought. Soon, he sees another sign which says: SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5 MILES and realizes that these signs are for real. When he drives past a third sign saying:…
(0)
Loading...
The young blonde American girl, on her very first trip to Paris, decided to test the French male’s fabled expertise in the art of love-making. On her first date, she asked him what exactly he intended to do with her. “First,” he replied, “I weel remove ze dress. Zen, I will carry you to ze bed. And zen,” he added triumphantly, “I will kiss ze navel.” “Big deal!!!” the blonde said. “I’ve had my navel kissed hundreds of times before.”…
(0)Loading...
Near the end of a particularly trying round of golf, during which the golfer had hit numerous fat shots, he said in frustration to his caddy, “I’d move heaven and earth to break a hundred on this course.” “Try heaven,” said the caddy. “You’ve already moved most of the earth.”
(0)Loading...
Two men were out hunting one day,when one man says to the other i’ve gotta shit. His friend tells him to make sure he goes downwind so he won’t scare the deer. After the first man had been gone for about twenty minutes a huge deer comes walking up and the remaining man shoots it. When hisfriend didn’t yell out to ask if he killed it , he deciced he should search for the man. Thinking his buddy may have…
(2)Loading...
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office. After his checkup, the doctor pulled the wife into his office alone. He said, “Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. He will surely die if you don’t do the following: Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant, and make sure he is in a good mood. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him.…
(1)Loading...
An healthy and shy man, 70 years old, at the doctor’s office. – “Hey doc… I don’t know how it is possible… I’m very anxious about… but, I’m… a little ashamed… Many of my same aged friends are saying they have intercourse six times a week.” – “What’s the problem? Tell them the same thing!!”
(0)Loading...
Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand. I am in shape. Round is a shape. Time may be a great healer, but it’s also a lousy beautician. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic. Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good. Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand. Stupidity got us into this mess — why can’t it get us out? Even if you are on the…
(0)Loading...
Dear Lord: So far today, I am doing alright. I have not gossiped, lost my temper, been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish or self indulgent. I have not whined, bitched, cursed, or eaten any chocolate. I have not charged on my credit card. However, I am going to get out of bed in a few minutes and I will need a lot more help after that.
(0)Loading...
There are three prostitutes sitting at a bar discussing the size of their hole. The first one says, “I can get a whole fist up mine!” The second says, “That’s nothing! I can get two fists up mine!” The third one just slides down the bar stool!
(0)Loading...
When Arnold Schwartzenegger was a young boy living in Austria, he and his friends used to enjoy a game in which they pretended they were composers (being that Austria was known for having produced some great composers in its time). One day they were playing their usual game and the first boy yelled out, “I want to be Mozart!”. Immediately the second boy chimed in saying, “I want to be Chopin!”. Lastly was Arnold who was quoted as saying, “Then…
(0)Loading...