Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
In the early days of his career, author Erle Stanley Gardner, creator of the famous Perry Mason mysteries, churned out stories for pulp magazines at the rate of 200,000 words a month. As he was paid by the word, the length of the story was more important than its quality, and he tended to draw the maximum potential from every incident. His villains, for example, were always killed by the last bullet in the gun. Gardner’s editor once asked him…
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Sybil brought an old picture of her dead husband, wearing a hat, to the photographer. She wanted to know if the photographer could remove the hat from the picture. He convinced her he could easily do that. Then he asked her which side of his head he parted his hair on. “I forget,” Sybil said. “But you can see that for yourself when you remove his hat.”
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“Doctor, that rectal exam hurt like hell. What did you do?” “I used two fingers.” “What for?” “I needed a second opinion.”
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Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses. No one in Greece has memorized all 158 verses. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. The average secretary’s left hand does 56% of the typing. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes. There are more chickens than people in the world. Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in…
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A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South. He got a ride from a mean-looking redneck trucker. After riding about 30 miles in silence,the youth finally said, “Well, aren’t you going to ask me?” “Ask you what?” replied the trucker. “If I’m a guy or a gal, cause I have long hair,” answered the youth. “Don’t matter to me,” replied the trucker. “I’m gonna fuck ya anyway.”
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1. When you’re playing the piano, you frequently lose your grip on the bow. 2. You go to bed and accidentally fluff up your head. 3. You’re absolutely convinced nostalgia is a thing of the past. 4. You go to bed and purposely fluff up your head. 5. You purchase season tickets to the Super Bowl. 6. You have trouble picking your shadow out of a crowd. 7. You’ve caught yourself waving “Goodbye” instead of “Hello” when answering the telephone.…
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Why did the turtle cross the street? To get to the Shell station.
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You might be a redneck if: The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table…. in front of her kids. Last year you hid Easter eggs under cow pies. You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws. You think a woman who is “out of your league” bowls on a different night. Jack Daniels makes your list of “Most Admired People.” You think…
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A guy runs home and bursts in yelling, “Pack your bags, honey! I’ve just won the lottery!” She says, “Oh wonderful! Should I pack for the beach or the mountains?” He replies, “I don’t care…just get the **** out!”
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Big Dog is showing Little Dog around the block. Sniff, sniff. “Smell that?” asks Big Dog. Sniff, sniff. “Sure do,” says Little Dog. “What is it?” “Fifi’s in heat. Come on, I’ll show you what to do.” So Big Dog shows Little Dog how to hump Fifi. Sniff, sniff. “Smell that?” asks Big Dog. Sniff, sniff. Sure do. What’s that?” asks Little Dog. “Garbage. Come on, I’ll show you what to do.” So Big Dog shows Little Dog how to…
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