Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
When the doctor takes his history and does the physical exam, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL has seen no improvement. “Listen,” says the Doc, “I have migranes, too, and the advice I’m going to give you isn’t really anything I learned in medical school, but it’s advice that I’ve gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice…
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On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: “Product will be hot after heating.” On Tesco’s Tirimisu Dessert: “Do not turn upside down.” (Printed on bottom of box.) On packaging for a Rowenta Iron: “Do not iron clothes on body.” On Boot’s CHILDREN’S cough medicine: “Do not drive car or operate heavy machinery.” On Nytol (a sleep aid): “Warning: May cause drowsiness.” On a Korean kitchen knife: “Warning – – keep out of children.” On a string of Christmas lights from China:…
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Q. Why did the blond steal the cop car? A. Because it had 911 on the side of it and she thought it was a Porsche.
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An airline stewardess was giving the standard safety briefing to the passengers. She had just finished saying “In the event of a water landing, your seat cushion may be used as a flotation device,” when a man remarked: “Hey! If the plane can’t fly, why should I believe the seat can float?”
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Frederick II, the 18th century king of Prussia, fancied himself an enlightened monarch, and in some respects he was. On one occasion he is supposed to have interested himself in conditions in the Berlin prison and was escorted through it so that he might speak to the prisoners. One after another, the prisoners fell to their knees before him, bewailing their lot and, predictably, protesting their total innocence of all charges that had been brought against them. Only one prisoner…
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There were 3 monkeys in a tree..why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -Peer pressure.
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Why was the blonde so happy to finish the puzzle in 4 years. Because the box said years 2-6
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Three cowboys are sitting around a campfire, out on the lonesome prairie, each with the bravado for which cowboys are famous. A night of tall tales begins. The first one says, “I must be the meanest, toughest cowboy there is! Why, just the other day, a bull got loose in the corral and gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns, with my bare hands.” The second one can’t stand to be bested. “Why that’s…
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The CIA loses track of one of its operatives, and so calls in one of their top spy hunters. The CIA boss says, “All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he’s somewhere in Ireland. If you think you’ve located him, tell him the code words, ‘The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning.’ If it’s really him, he’ll answer, ‘Yes, and for mist at noon as well.’” So the spy hunter goes to…
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The visiting church school supervisor asks little Johnny during Bible class who broke down the walls of Jericho. Little Johnny replies that he does not know, but it definitely is not him. The supervisor, taken aback by this lack of basic Bible knowledge, goes to the school principal and relates the whole incident. The principal replies that he knows little Johnny, as well as his whole family very well and can vouch for them, and if little Johnny said that…
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